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Some people think that family has the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think that other factors such as television, friend, music have the biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#people #influence #child’s #development #factors #television #friend #music #effects
Many individuals argue that family plays the most significant role in shaping a
child
's
development
,
while
 others believe that external
factors
such
 as television, friends, and
music
 exert a more substantial
influence
. I would argue that,
although
 external
factors
 can have an impact, the family remains the most powerful force in a
child
's
development
. There might be several reasons why some people believe that family has the most powerful
influence
.
This
 means that parents and other family members are the primary sources of emotional support, values, and behaviour modelling for children.
For instance
, parents who actively engage in their
child
's education, enforce rules, and provide a nurturing environment often see their children excel academically and socially. The constant presence and guidance of family members create a foundation for the
child
's character and values. Despite the arguments mentioned above, others claim that external
factors
 like television, friends, and
music
 can have a more significant impact on a
child
's
development
.
In other words
, children spend a considerable amount of time interacting with peers, consuming media, and listening to
music
, which can shape their opinions, interests, and behaviour.
Such
 exposure could lead to the adoption of trends, language, and habits that are distinct from those promoted within the family, highlighting the significant
influence
 of external
factors
. In conclusion,
while
 external
factors
such
 as television, friends, and
music
 undeniably
influence
 a
child
's
development
, the role of the family remains paramount. Families provide the fundamental framework for emotional support and moral guidance, which are essential for a
child
's
overall
 growth.
Therefore
, I maintain that the family has the most powerful
influence
 on a
child
's
development
, despite the notable impact of external
factors
.
Submitted by eparfenenkov on

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task achievement
Add more specific examples to strengthen your arguments, especially when discussing the influence of external factors like television, friends, and music.
coherence cohesion
Ensure every paragraph has a clear topic sentence to improve the coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and effective introduction and conclusion, making the overall structure easy to follow.
task achievement
You provide a well-balanced discussion by considering both viewpoints and expressing your own opinion clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • primary influence
  • development
  • instill values
  • norms
  • emotional foundation
  • social skills
  • role modeling
  • socioeconomic status
  • opportunities
  • resources
  • external factors
  • peer influence
  • teenage years
  • impact mood
  • cultural understanding
  • environment
  • role models
  • social media
  • shaping modern childhoods
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