More and more parents are allowing their children to play on computers and tablets as they think that children should learn technology skills. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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These days numerous
paretns
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parents
are letting their children
to
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apply
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use electronic
devices
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such
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as computers and tablets to learn technological aspects.
To begin
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, computers and tablets give a wide range of information, leading to an
improve
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improvement
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in terms of knowledge. In my opinion,
cons
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the cons
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of
this
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development
outweight
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outweigh
pros
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the pros
show examples
. One of the main negatives is that skills from
devices
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could yield
to
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apply
show examples
addiction for teenagers as they provide various games and videos.
For example
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, there are more than 40000
of
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apply
show examples
online games and 1000000
contents
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content
show examples
in the media currently.
Hence
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,
younge
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young
users would
be
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apply
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easily get used to these repetitive tasks,
yielding
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causing
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them to click on different contents without hesitation.
This
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may
also
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affect
chilldren
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children
to get away from education as it does not give the same enjoyment, so teenagers merely stay in the house with
devices
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by themselves, leading to
the
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apply
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social anxiety.
However
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, children could use
devices
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in the form of learning
souces
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sources
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for their education.
For instance
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, there
are
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is
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a large number of
contents
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content
show examples
by professionals to improve their performances
wihtout
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without
any
further
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costs.
This
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improves the students' potential significantly since they
recognitse
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recognise
different approaches
of
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to
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gaining symmetric information.
Therefore
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,
a
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the
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skill of data sciences is
enhenced
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enhanced
dramatically from online in
early
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the early
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stage, so
this
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would stand out during job
applicationin
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application in
the
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in the
show examples
future. In conclusion,
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the drabacks
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drabacks
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drawbacks
of having social problems and demotivation of
leaning
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learning
show examples
outweigh
benefits
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the benefits
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of widening the future potential.
This
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could give more
times
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time
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to their parents, but it would harm children indirectly.
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task achievement
The essay presents a relevant response to the task and addresses both advantages and disadvantages. However, some points could be more developed with specific examples and further explanation to create a more compelling argument.
task achievement
Work on eliminating minor spelling and grammatical errors to improve clarity and readability. Also, ensure that each point is well-supported with specific examples and detailed explanations where necessary.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, transitioning between ideas can be smoother. Use linking words and phrases to ensure better flow and connection between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Some points, such as the idea that using computers and tablets can lead to addiction, are introduced but not fully expanded upon. Developing this idea further with more examples or evidence would strengthen the argument.
task achievement
The response clearly addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of allowing children to use electronic devices. This shows a balanced view and understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The essay is structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow the writer's line of thought.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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