More and more parents are allowing their children to play on computers and tablets as they think that children should learn technology skills. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
These days numerous
paretns
are letting their children Correct your spelling
parents
to
use electronic Change the verb form
apply
devices
such
as computers and tablets to learn technological aspects. To begin
, computers and tablets give a wide range of information, leading to an improve
in terms of knowledge. In my opinion, Replace the word
improvement
cons
of Correct article usage
the cons
this
development outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
pros
.
One of the main negatives is that skills from Correct article usage
the pros
devices
could yield to
addiction for teenagers as they provide various games and videos. Change preposition
apply
For example
, there are more than 40000 of
online games and 1000000 Change preposition
apply
contents
in the media currently. Fix the agreement mistake
content
Hence
, younge
users would Correct your spelling
young
be
easily get used to these repetitive tasks, Unnecessary verb
apply
yielding
them to click on different contents without hesitation. Verb problem
causing
This
may also
affect chilldren
to get away from education as it does not give the same enjoyment, so teenagers merely stay in the house with Correct your spelling
children
devices
by themselves, leading to the
social anxiety.
Correct article usage
apply
However
, children could use devices
in the form of learning souces
for their education. Correct your spelling
sources
For instance
, there are
a large number of Correct subject-verb agreement
is
contents
by professionals to improve their performances Fix the agreement mistake
content
wihtout
any Correct your spelling
without
further
costs. This
improves the students' potential significantly since they recognitse
different approaches Correct your spelling
recognise
of
gaining symmetric information. Change preposition
to
Therefore
, a
skill of data sciences is Correct article usage
the
enhenced
dramatically from online in Correct your spelling
enhanced
early
stage, so Correct article usage
the early
this
would stand out during job applicationin
Correct your spelling
application in
the
future.
In conclusion, Change preposition
in the
Correct article usage
the drabacks
drabacks
of having social problems and demotivation of Correct your spelling
drawbacks
leaning
outweigh Correct your spelling
learning
benefits
of widening the future potential. Correct article usage
the benefits
This
could give more times
to their parents, but it would harm children indirectly.Fix the agreement mistake
time
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task achievement
The essay presents a relevant response to the task and addresses both advantages and disadvantages. However, some points could be more developed with specific examples and further explanation to create a more compelling argument.
task achievement
Work on eliminating minor spelling and grammatical errors to improve clarity and readability. Also, ensure that each point is well-supported with specific examples and detailed explanations where necessary.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, transitioning between ideas can be smoother. Use linking words and phrases to ensure better flow and connection between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Some points, such as the idea that using computers and tablets can lead to addiction, are introduced but not fully expanded upon. Developing this idea further with more examples or evidence would strengthen the argument.
task achievement
The response clearly addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of allowing children to use electronic devices. This shows a balanced view and understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The essay is structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow the writer's line of thought.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...