It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
It is believed that it is necessary for
people
to get out of their comfort zone, both in their work lives and their individual lives. From my point of view, I reckon that the drawbacks of taking risks
outweigh the benefits for some reasons mentioned in this
essay.
On the one hand, accepting risks
brings some advantages. First and foremost, people
have opportunities to improve themselves. Particularly, when they find new and creative solutions to problems at work or in their family, their problem-solving skills will be enhanced. In addition
, their discovery and creativity will also
be increased due to
risks
which push them to experience new and innovative ideas. As a result
, people
will discover and make use of potential that they have never known.
On the other hand
, taking risks
also
has some disadvantages. First,
if the challenge cannot be estimated, it can lead to a serious financial failure. Consequently
, they will face mental problems such
as stress, anxiety, feelings of disappointment or even depression, additionally
, the family's stable finances will be affected. Moreover
, if your risky decisions affect other people
, you will lose your reliability and trust. Therefore
, you will demolish crucial relationships which has a negative impact on your profession. Furthermore
, if the challenge fails, it will take a long time to recover consequences and start again, hence
it appears permanent negative impacts.
In conclusion, even though it is essential for people
to accept risks
, both in their profession and private lives, I reckon that the negative aspects of taking risks
outweigh the advantages.Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on
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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your points. For instance, mentioning a real-life scenario where someone took a risk and either succeeded or failed would make your essay more relatable and compelling.
task achievement
Try to elaborate a bit more on your arguments. For example, instead of just stating that people will face stress and anxiety, explain how these mental health issues could practically affect a person's life or career.
coherence cohesion
Work on making your transitions smoother. This will help in making your essay read more fluidly. Using transition words like 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' and 'Hence' is good, but try to integrate them more naturally into your writing.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This makes it easy for readers to follow your argument.
task achievement
You have effectively addressed both sides of the argument, providing a balanced view before giving your own opinion. This is a strong aspect of your task response.