It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is believed that it is necessary for

people

Use synonyms

to get out of their comfort zone, both in their work lives and their individual lives. From my point of view, I reckon that the drawbacks of taking

risks

Use synonyms

outweigh the benefits for some reasons mentioned in

this

Linking Words

essay. On the one hand, accepting

risks

Use synonyms

brings some advantages. First and foremost,

people

Use synonyms

have opportunities to improve themselves. Particularly, when they find new and creative solutions to problems at work or in their family, their problem-solving skills will be enhanced.

In addition

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, their discovery and creativity will

also

Linking Words

be increased

due to

Linking Words

risks

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which push them to experience new and innovative ideas.

As a result

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people

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will discover and make use of potential that they have never known.

On the other hand

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, taking

risks

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also

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has some disadvantages.

First,

Linking Words

if the challenge cannot be estimated, it can lead to a serious financial failure.

Consequently

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, they will face mental problems

such

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as stress, anxiety, feelings of disappointment or even depression,

additionally

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, the family's stable finances will be affected.

Moreover

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, if your risky decisions affect other

people

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, you will lose your reliability and trust.

Therefore

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, you will demolish crucial relationships which has a negative impact on your profession.

Furthermore

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, if the challenge fails, it will take a long time to recover consequences and start again,

hence

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it appears permanent negative impacts. In conclusion, even though it is essential for

people

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to accept

risks

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, both in their profession and private lives, I reckon that the negative aspects of taking

risks

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outweigh the advantages.

ieltswritingpracticedlSun Aug 04 2024

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task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your points. For instance, mentioning a real-life scenario where someone took a risk and either succeeded or failed would make your essay more relatable and compelling.

task achievement

Try to elaborate a bit more on your arguments. For example, instead of just stating that people will face stress and anxiety, explain how these mental health issues could practically affect a person's life or career.

coherence cohesion

Work on making your transitions smoother. This will help in making your essay read more fluidly. Using transition words like 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' and 'Hence' is good, but try to integrate them more naturally into your writing.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This makes it easy for readers to follow your argument.

task achievement

You have effectively addressed both sides of the argument, providing a balanced view before giving your own opinion. This is a strong aspect of your task response.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some people feel that manufactures and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of foods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

8.Shops should not be allowed to sell any food or drink that have been scientifically proved to be bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that criminals should be given longer term imprisonment, so as to reduce the crime rate. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As children become adults, their social behaviour changes in some ways. What are the main differences between young children’s social behaviour and that of adults? To what extent are the changes that take place good?