Some people say patriotism causes problems and is negative overall. Others feel that it is beneficial for society at large. Do the advantages of patriotism outweight its disadvantages?

Firstly

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, I do agree that the advantages of

patriotism

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outweigh its disadvantages and I will gladly provide reasons,

such

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as how it is beneficial for our

society

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we do need all the love and support in our lives and I do find it very upsetting that some people do not see how

patriotism

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is a great and beneficial thing to have as a

society

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Secondly

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, we live in a world where

patriotism

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is almost fading away because we

forgot

Wrong verb form

have forgotten

show examples

how much

impact

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it holds

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show examples

us as a

society

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not that only but

also

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there are people who think that

patriotism

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causes problems and is negative

overall

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. To those I would like to ask why they think in that way , and what made them assume that

patriotism

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causes problems and harm to

society

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Hence

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, what they think, say and answer I stand with my thoughts because I have reasons to believe the advantages of

patriotism

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I saw the advantages in our loving

society

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I saw how close , honest and strong we are.

Finally

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, I do wish that you saw what

impact

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patriotism

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holds either negative or positive.

Lastly

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, even if it holds a negative

impact

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as a strong

society

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we can turn it into a positive

impact

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and not let anything negative affect us or come our way, we can get through it so easily as a loving

society

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filled with only positive

patriotism

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, not any negative feelings or negative thoughts we should not allow any kind of negativity flow around us.

alaanoudaltammaami

Aug 4, 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic, but it lacks clear examples and detailed arguments that support your stance. Provide specific examples and elaborate on them to make your points stronger.

coherence and cohesion

The essay would benefit from a clear structure - introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea and provide evidence to support that idea.

coherence and cohesion

Work on separating your ideas into distinct paragraphs. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily and make your essay more cohesive.

coherence and cohesion

Add a clear introduction that outlines the main points you will discuss in your essay. Include a conclusion that summarizes your arguments and reinforces your stance.

coherence and cohesion

Use transitional phrases to link your ideas smoothly. This will help improve the flow of your writing.

task achievement

You express a strong personal conviction in your essay, which is important.

task achievement

You attempt to address both sides of the argument, which is commendable.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

255 words

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Some people say patriotism causes problems and is negative overall. Others feel that it is beneficial for society at large. Do the advantages of patriotism outweight its disadvantages?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Write a letter to the admission tutor. In your letter explain your position apologise and offer to come on another day or later the same day also ask how long the interview will be, and whether there will be any tests during it You should write at least 150 words.

When choosing a job, salary is the most important decision. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, students leave high school without learning how to manage their money. Why is that the case? What could be done to tackle the issue? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.