Large companies often use sports events to promote their products. Some people think this hurts sports. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#companies #sports #events #products #people

It is true that

athletes

take part in commercials in order to advertise large

companies

' products.

Although

sportsmen's cooperation in advertising is accepted by some individuals, it has its own opponents. I strongly agree with it and

also

I believe that not only can it financially benefit

sports

Correct article usage

the sports

show examples

sector, but

also

it can bring more popularity and fame to

athletes

. First of all, advertising for large

companies

provides considerable funds for

sports

Correct article usage

the sports

show examples

population. It is evident that successful

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

teams mostly need sponsors to afford their expenses, from various game entrances to clothing and special diets.

For

this

reason, having an affluent sponsor by their side can guarantee a better performance in

sports

events. In

this

case, if

athletes

agree to participate in commercials,

companies

will pay for their expenses and that would be a win-win for both sides. Another indication is that by advertising well-known

companies

' products,

athletes

can be seen more in public. There are many

sports

that regardless of their several achievements, are neglected in the public eye and they are not getting enough credits as they deserve.

Thus

, by taking part in

such

activities, they would get a chance to shine and

appreciated

Add a missing verb

be appreciated

show examples

by society.

For instance

, in Iran, people were not informed about women's Whusu , which has won many medals over the years, until one of the

athletes

,Shahrbano Mansorian, advertised for one of the food

companies

and out of a sudden they became famous. These days, many people know her and follow their victories. In conclusion, the cooperation of

companies

and sport can be rewarding for both. Large

companies

can be decent sponsors for

sports

teams and assist them with expenses

as well as

giving them an opportunity to be seen by people.

Submitted by TUTOO on Sun Aug 04 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

While the essay is well-structured, ensure you explicitly address the opposing viewpoint on how commercialization might harm sports. This can provide a more balanced argument.

coherence cohesion

Some sentences need minor adjustment for clarity. For example, 'sports population' could be better expressed as 'sports community' or 'athletes'.

task achievement

The essay is very clear and concise, and it provides strong and relevant examples.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are both well-written and effectively summarize the main points of the essay.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

289 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks, and motorcycles are banned from the city center. Public transportation like buses, taxis, and metros are advised. To what extent do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?
Urban areas are very congested these days therefore, there are special occasions in which big lorries, personal cars and motorcycles are prohibited in the central sections of the city. In addition, using public services is recommended on such occasions. There are some drawbacks related to it and some benefits which are more invaluable than those of problems.
5
band
Some educational systems make students study specialised subjects while others require students to study a wide range. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
In this day and age, many people still debated about whether the children should neither learn the overall courses or the specific field at school. Despite this topic still being a public controversy, this essay will explain both of these views, and I believe that the pupils who learning a wide range of studies will get more benefits than the students that only focus on certain field of studies.
4.5
band
In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?
In today's digital age, there is a rise in customer who are curious, which lead to spend money on imported food more than local food. However, this can be tackled by increasing tax on imported food, including focuses of traditional food.
4.5
band
Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)
Many think that the larger the companies are, the higher wages they have to pay for their COEs and executives. This is because of that, the higher positions are the one who control and order the command to others. Therefore, some of the people believe that the more their paid to the Mannger, the better results they wil get. This essay argues to the statement that the big companies should pay greater earns to the CEOs and other managers compared to the lower level of workers.
6
band
Do advantages of the Internet outweigh its disadvantages ?[423]
Information technology has fantastically come over as a breath of fresh air in people’s lives. It cannot be denied that the benefits IT brings about are so wondrous. Yet I still firmly believe that the drawbacks of technology outweigh the positives of it. I will provide relevant reasoning and evidence to support my stance.

Large companies often use sports events to promote their products. Some people think this hurts sports. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks, and motorcycles are banned from the city center. Public transportation like buses, taxis, and metros are advised. To what extent do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Some educational systems make students study specialised subjects while others require students to study a wide range. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)

Do advantages of the Internet outweigh its disadvantages ?[423]