The internet has transformed the way we live, but it has alos created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?
In the modern era, the
internet
has become the
integral part of Change the article
an
human's
life, Change noun form
human
however
, along with
technological advancement, numerous severe issues are origin by the internet
will stop this
as a discuss about the
problems and Correct article usage
apply
solution
off the Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
internet
.
When it comes to the problems Correct pronoun usage
that emerged
emerged
from the Wrong verb form
emerge
internet
, the first and foremost most commonly
issues Change the word
common
comes
Correct pronoun usage
that comes
into
light Change preposition
to
is
online scams and frauds. Since people have started using digital Correct subject-verb agreement
are
transaction
and online banking through Fix the agreement mistake
transactions
internet
, they off only Add an article
the internet
targeted
by Add a missing verb
been targeted
the
scammers. They always seek innocent individuals from whom they can still information, which is called fishing. Correct article usage
apply
Secondly
, people especially Young
Generation Correct article usage
the Young
is
using the Correct subject-verb agreement
are
internet
immensely these days for online classes, online games and for
social media. Change preposition
apply
This
addictive behavior
is not wise for their physical Change the spelling
behaviour
as well as
mental health. For example
, according to
the
Correct article usage
apply
doctors
76% population of children have weaker eyesight in the world Add a comma
doctors,
due to
the excessive use of the internet
. If they continue to do so they will have to undergo eye-surgeries
.
When it comes to the solutions Correct your spelling
eye surgeries
of
the given problem, the first and the most effective one, I believe is Change preposition
to
the
strong security measures needs to be implemented by online websites on their online services. So that they can easily Correct your spelling
that
detected
and Change the verb form
be detected
detect
logged
sensitive data in case of stealing Wrong verb form
log
install
Verb problem
apply
secondly
, social awareness could be the possible course of action through the government can reduce the usage of the internet
among the Younger demographics. This
can be done by familiarize
them with Wrong verb form
familiarising
severe
repercussions and negative impacts of the Correct article usage
the severe
internet
. For example
, in 2017, as online
shopping website Amazon realized that their customers Correct article usage
the online
are
triggered by online scammers, they started using Wrong verb form
were
one
Correct determiner usage
a
time
password method to secure the safety of their customers and the data has been Correct your spelling
one-time
showed
that Change the verb form
showing
shown
this
matter successfully dropped online scamming by 73%.
In conclusion, the internet
is Boon
for our modern society, which has a lot of positive impacts, Correct article usage
a Boon
however
, it's
negative sides cannot be ignored. After considering the Correct your spelling
its
internet
's role in the modern world, I believe, individual
have to learn how to use the Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
internet
wisely.Submitted by rajwants.1997 on
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coherence cohesion
You should improve the logical flow of ideas in your essay. At times, the transitions between ideas feel abrupt and lack seamless connection. Try using more cohesive devices and linking words to join sentences and paragraphs together smoothly.
coherence cohesion
There are areas with grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. For instance, 'the internet has become the integral part of human's life' should be 'the internet has become an integral part of human life'. Focus on refining these sentences for clarity, and consider proofreading for grammatical issues.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples, but ensure they are clearly linked to the problem or solution being discussed. For example, your mention of children and weaker eyesight due to internet use could be expanded on by linking directly to the specific problems it causes.
task achievement
You have successfully identified two major problems associated with the internet – online scams and excessive use by young people. This shows good understanding of current issues.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay and offers a perspective on the responsible use of the internet.