Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Whether or not the purpose of
museums
is to entertain or educate
people
is a topic of debate. The writer of
this
essay believes that despite
museums
increasing the number of visitors for entertainment, they should primarily be used to educate
people
about culture and
history
. It must be understood that one of the essential roles of
museums
is to enhance tourism in the country. To put it simply, when
museums
have a good appearance or organize many events
such
as exhibitions and galleries, they will attract numerous visitors who come to these places to take photos or immerse themselves in the collective atmosphere.
As a result
,
museums
play a vital role in society by contributing to the national revenue.
However
, some
people
believe that the purpose of
museums
is cultural education.
In other words
, thanks to the collection of tangible and intangible heritage, the younger generations can discover the development of their culture, leading to a broader understanding of their origins.
Consequently
, many significant cultural practices continue to thrive, offering immense sentimental value to humanity. In my opinion,
museums
can maintain
history
and transmit it to future generations.
This
is because many
artifacts
Change the spelling
artefacts
show examples
and documents provide insight into past societies and civilizations.
Additionally
, children will be fascinated by the extraordinary
artifacts
Change the spelling
artefacts
show examples
and their associated stories, so
this
approach can motivate the younger generations to discover
history
.
For instance
, in Vietnam, school trips consistently visit
museums
as a crucial destination to educate students about
history
. In conclusion,
while
some
people
think that attracting visitors for entertainment purposes is the main goal of
museums
, I believe that cultural and historical education are the crucial roles of
museums
.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure better clarity in differentiating points in body paragraphs. One paragraph should focus solely on the entertainment purpose, while the other focuses on the educational aspect. This will improve readability.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the use of transition phrases between points within paragraphs; this will promote smoother reading and better connection between sentences.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support points in both aspects of the discussion. This adds depth and relatability to the arguments.
introduction conclusion present
Strong introduction and conclusion that clearly present the writer's standpoint.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ideas are presented clearly and are largely well-organized, making for a convincing argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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