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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Nowadays, more and more people tend to take information from online news than from newspapers or TV. What is the positive and negative sides of this development

#people #information #news #newspapers #tv #development
Today, the majority of society chooses to gain information from the
internet
 rather than other sources
such
 as television and newspapers. I think, despite that it is a positive development there is a bit of negative development which impacts health. There is no doubt that, now all
people
 have gadgets
such
 as phones, laptops and tablets and by using these items
people
 may damage their health,especially their eyes.
Firstly
,the light that comes from gadgets drains
people
's energy and debilitates them.
Secondly
,decreasing
people
's vision related to using technical items too.
Moreover
, the
internet
 can be full of distractions including various videos or chats and there is a lot of misinformation that spreads rapidly.
Although
 more
people
 opt
internet
 because of its speed there are negative impacts too.
However
, by using the
internet
people
 have an opportunity to find data easier and faster.
For instance
,
people
 who are interested in the
news
 of other countries can translate
into
Correct pronoun usage
it into
show examples
 their own language
instead
 of waiting
while
 the government publishes it in the newspapers or shows on TV programs.
Additionally
,online websites are convenient for
people
 they can access
news
 anytime and anywhere with an
internet
 connection.The most main thing is information or
news
 is updated instantly which today's world requires it.
Therefore
, now every person despite their age prefers to use the
internet
.
To conclude
, despite the negative development of the
internet
 like distraction,misinformation and harm to
people
's health,more
people
 choose it in order to access
news
 more easily and faster.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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coherence cohesion
Structure your essay into clear paragraphs to improve readability. Use one paragraph for each main point.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points. Specific examples strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid run-on sentences by breaking them into shorter, more manageable sentences. This will help clarify your ideas.
task achievement
The essay discusses both positive and negative aspects of the topic, showing a balanced view.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.
logical structure
Points are logically ordered, generally following a consistent structure.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ ยปโ€” a book that's free for ๐Ÿš€ Premium users.

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