The graph below show gives information about the percentage of population in four asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictaion for 2030 and 2040
The graph provides information about the
percentage
of population
in Philippines
, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia, countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with Correct article usage
the Philippines
prediction
for 2030 to 2040.
Fix the agreement mistake
predictions
Overall
, Malaysia was
Unnecessary verb
apply
clearlly
the highest Correct your spelling
clearly
popuation
from 2000 to 2040 years than the other countries. In 1990 Correct your spelling
population
percentage
of the Correct article usage
the percentage
population
, shows changed suddenly in all four countries.
Malaysia
Change noun form
Malaysia's
population
living in city
Add an article
the city
start
Wrong verb form
started
30
% in 1970 and upward to 80% in 2040. Change preposition
at 30
In addition
, from 2030 to 2040 was rasie
Correct your spelling
raise
anly
about 5%.
Correct your spelling
only
In
1970 to 1980 the Change preposition
From
percentage
of the pepole
living in Correct your spelling
people
Philippines
was the same rate. Correct article usage
the Philippines
However
, in last
of 1980 suddenly Correct article usage
the last
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
about
50%.
From 1990 to 2020 Add a missing verb
was about
was
the same rate Unnecessary verb
apply
percentage
of people living in Thailand. Also
,Hitting the highest point around 50% of population
in 2040.
Indonesia Add an article
the population
was have
the lowest Change the verb form
had
population
in 1970,but from 1970 to 1980 was gently increase
. Wrong verb form
increased
Furthermore
, the population
in indonesia
Change the capitalization
Indonesia
start
to grow until became the second highest Wrong verb form
started
population
of other all three cities.Submitted by modhialarjani1999 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
▼
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!