The graph below show gives information about the percentage of population in four asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictaion for 2030 and 2040

The graph below show gives information about the percentage of population in four asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictaion for 2030 and 2040
The graph provides information about the
percentage
of
population
in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia, countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with
prediction
Fix the agreement mistake
predictions
show examples
for 2030 to 2040.
Overall
, Malaysia
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
clearlly
Correct your spelling
clearly
the highest
popuation
Correct your spelling
population
from 2000 to 2040 years than the other countries. In 1990
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
of the
population
, shows changed suddenly in all four countries.
Malaysia
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Malaysia's
show examples
population
living in
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
30
Change preposition
at 30
show examples
% in 1970 and upward to 80% in 2040.
In addition
, from 2030 to 2040 was
rasie
Correct your spelling
raise
anly
Correct your spelling
only
about 5%.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
1970 to 1980 the
percentage
of the
pepole
Correct your spelling
people
living in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
was the same rate.
However
, in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
of 1980 suddenly
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
about
Add a missing verb
was about
show examples
50%. From 1990 to 2020
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the same rate
percentage
of people living in Thailand.
Also
,Hitting the highest point around 50% of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
in 2040. Indonesia
was have
Change the verb form
had
show examples
the lowest
population
in 1970,but from 1970 to 1980 was gently
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
.
Furthermore
, the
population
in
indonesia
Change the capitalization
Indonesia
show examples
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
to grow until became the second highest
population
of other all three cities.
Submitted by modhialarjani1999 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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