In many countries, international tourism has become an important source of income. However, it also has negative effects. Do the benefits of international tourism outweigh the disadvantages?
share their thinks with friends and family and maybe
another
Replace the adjective
other
show examples
people
Use synonyms
prefer the
country
Use synonyms
. So more
people
Use synonyms
visit the
country
Use synonyms
and get more money because
people
Use synonyms
spend the money in the
country
Use synonyms
visit during.
Body paragraph 2
Also
Linking Words
the
country
Use synonyms
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
more
people
Use synonyms
.
World
Add an article
The world
show examples
always changes. World period is
adverb
Correct article usage
an adverb
show examples
period now. İf we visit international
location
Fix the agreement mistake
locations
show examples
we share on social media accounts.
Then
Linking Words
different
people
Use synonyms
see
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
our posts and maybe they like the location. Social media benefits
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
international
tourism
Use synonyms
.
Conclusion
Finally
Linking Words
, international
tourism
Use synonyms
brings more money and influence to the
country
Use synonyms
and
people
Use synonyms
learn is different
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
and see new destinations.
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task achievement
You have addressed the task, but the essay would benefit from more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are clear, but try to organize them into clearer paragraphs with topic sentences. This will improve the logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Work on providing a more detailed conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion.
language ability
There are minor grammatical errors and awkward phrases. Consider using more complex sentences and vocabulary to improve clarity and fluency.
task achievement
You have clearly stated your opinion in favor of the benefits of international tourism.
task content
You recognize the influence of social media in promoting international tourism, which is a relevant and modern point.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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