This is my IELTS writing task 2 essay question: Some people think adults should give children freedom to make mistakes. Others think adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There has been a constant debate about whether
parents
should let their children
make mistakes
freely or whether parents
should prevent them from doing so. In this
essay, I will elaborate on both views and give my own opinion on this
matter.
On the one hand, some people say that parents
should let their offspring make mistakes
. It is true that making mistakes
enables children
to learn and develop, since mistakes
help the child
identify and understand their weaknesses, thus
putting effort into developing them. A study published in the Journal of Experimental Child
Psychology found that youngsters who made mistakes
during learning tasks and were given feedback showed better retention and understanding of the material than those who did not make mistakes
or were not given feedback. Additionally
, allowing children
to make mistakes
fosters resilience and problem-solving skills. For instance
, when children
attempt a challenging task and fail, they learn to analyze what went wrong and try different approaches, which is crucial for their cognitive and emotional development. Furthermore
, the acceptance and normalization of mistakes
can help kids become more confident. A study on child
development proved that children
who reflect on their mistakes
grow up to be more assertive, which is an important characteristic for their future personal and professional lives.
On the other hand
, some people believe that children
should be educated to avoid mistakes
. It is obvious that this
helps youngsters prevent certain risks and challenges. Research published in the journal Child
Development shows that adolescents who receive proactive guidance from their parents
are less likely to engage in risky behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
such
as drug use, delinquency, and premature sexual activity. This
highlights the importance of parental involvement in helping their offspring avoid these types of mistakes
. Additionally
, by preventing mistakes
, parents
can provide a safer environment for their children
to grow up in. For example
, by teaching children
about road safety and monitoring their online activities, parents
can protect them from potential dangers.
In conclusion, while
both points of view have their benefits, I strongly argue that parents
should give their kids the freedom to make mistakes
, as it offers them the opportunity to learn, grow, and develop properly. By allowing children
to make mistakes
, parents
help them build essential life skills such
as resilience, problem-solving, and confidence. Although
preventing certain mistakes
can protect children
from immediate harm, it is through their own experiences and failures that they truly learn and mature.Submitted by minhlieu.hnd on
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses all parts of the task, providing a clear discussion of both views and a well-rounded conclusion with your own opinion. To reach a higher score, consider adding a few more transitional devices to further enhance flow.
coherence cohesion
Although your coherence and cohesion are strong, be cautious with sentence length and structure to ensure maximum clarity. Breaking up longer sentences could make the essay even more reader-friendly.
task achievement
Your essay offers a complete response to the task, thoroughly discussing both views and giving a well-supported personal opinion.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is excellent, with clear topic sentences and supported main points.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.