Crimes and other kinds of information on TV and newspaper have bad consequences. This kind of information should be restricted to be shown in the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement.
Some people opine that unlawful activities and various other
type
of content should not be printed in newspapers and shown on TV by media because Change the wording
types
this
might have negative
impact on people. I, completely agree with Add an article
a negative
this
and shall be discussing my viewpoint in upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
with, though posting about what is happening in the world whether it is positive or negative can be helpful to undersatnd
the current situation, Correct your spelling
understand
however
it can have some repercussions also
. For instance
, circulating crime
news
can directly cause fear, trauma and negativity among young
generation which can impact their development. Add an article
the young
Also
, media nowadays is not only covering the actual news
but the current trend of sensationalism is something that creates unrealistic opinions and moral fear. News
these days are
not about the victims but it glorifies the criminal, which some people try to copy and it can increase the Correct subject-verb agreement
is
crime
rate too.
Additionally
, adult content on social media can make a children
astray from their original path which again is a considerable hurdle in their life. In the era of technology every person from Correct the article-noun agreement
children
a child
youngster
to elders , each one is addicted to their cellphones so reaching Fix the agreement mistake
youngsters
to
Change preposition
out to
such
news
and information is quite easy. Moreover
, beacuse
of Correct your spelling
because
such
content and heinous crime
news
get
viral Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
with
no time and Change preposition
in
this
substantially effect
the innocence of children. Children these days are more active and smart and Verb problem
affects
this
is beacuse
of publishing Correct your spelling
because
such
news
which also
leads to increase
in juvenile Correct article usage
an increase
crime
.
To conclude
, such
news
should not only be limited but sensualizing them should also
be stopped immediately. I,
believe the government should Remove the comma
apply
also
take some serious action against those news
channels and reporters who fails
to promote the actual Change the verb form
fail
news
and promote negativity.Submitted by simranjit2598 on
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task achievement
Try to refine the introduction to be more concise. For example, instead of saying "in upcoming paragraphs," briefly outline the main points you will discuss. This will enhance clarity.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and transitions smoothly from one point to the next. This will improve the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention specific cases or studies that show the impact of crime news on young people.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a strong framework for your argument.
task achievement
You have successfully covered multiple angles of the issue, such as the impact on children and the role of sensationalism in media.
coherence cohesion
Your language is generally clear and easy to understand, making your argument accessible to readers.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example