The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the numer of new shops that opened in one coutry between 2011 and 2018.

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The graph below illustrates the number of stores that shut down and the number of new establishments that launched in a particular country between 2011 and 2018

Overall

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, it can be seen that the trends were closures and openings which fluctuated in the amount. Looking at the line in detail, opening started at amount 85.000 in 2011, it turned down greatly to 4.000 in 2012. After that, it escalated to peak up the point at 6.000 in 2014.

Next,

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it decreased to 4.000 in 2015. And

then

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, it remained stable between 2016 to 2017. After that, the count dropped until the end period at 3.000 in 2018. Regarding the data on closures, it started at about 62.000 in 2011. And

then

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, it refused slowly at 6.000 in 2012. After that, it increased dramatically to 7.000 in 2013. And

then

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, it reduced gradually to approximately 61 in 2014.

Next,

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it dropped greatly to about 500 in 2015. Once it raised greatly at 51,000 in 2016. And

then

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, it stayed steady until the end period in 2018.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Thu Aug 08 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "next, ".

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

175 words

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The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the numer of new shops that opened in one coutry between 2011 and 2018.

some people believe that all children should learn a foreign language from the time they start school, while others feel it is better to wait until a child is at secondary school

You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment which you use for your job write a letter to the shop or company with supplied equipment in your letter describe the problem with equipment explain how this problem is affecting you say what you want the shop or company to do

In today's world many peoplel own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that we learn best through in person interaction with the teacher in a classroom. Others believe that learning is more effective. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.