You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter ● say why he/she would not enjoy going to college ● explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her ● suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

#friend #advice #college #job #idea

Dear Jasur, I was happy to get your letter about your plans. It's a big decision to choose between college and working. It's

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great that you are thinking about your future. I think getting a job is better for you than going to college. College has a lot of studying and exams I know you don't like it. You enjoy doing things and being active more than sitting in a classroom. Getting

job

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a job

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is a good idea because you can earn money and become more independent. It's a good way to start your career. Working

also

helps you develop skills that will be

usefull

Correct your spelling

useful

throughout your life. You can work in sales because you are good with people. And you have the ability to fix things with your hands, jobs like a mechanic,

electician

Correct your spelling

electrician

or carpenter could be suitable for you. I hope

this

helps make a decision. No

metter

Correct your spelling

matter

what you

choice

Replace the word

choose

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, I will always support you

Add the comma(s)

, my

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friend. Yours sincerely, Umirov Fayozbek

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Thu Aug 08 2024

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task achievement

Try to eliminate minor grammatical errors for a more polished letter. For instance, 'It's a great that' should be 'It's great that.'

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph has a single clear idea and develop it fully. This will enhance the logical flow of the letter.

suitable writing tone

The letter is friendly and supportive, which is ideal for an informal letter to a friend.

greeting and closing

The greeting and closing are appropriate and add a personal touch.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

165 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Real-world experience
Practical experience
Financial independence
On-the-job training
Student loan debt
Personal growth
Professional networking
Career development
Skilled workers
Job market
Career goals
Immediate income
Professional relationships
Market demand
Defining interests
Educational investments

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think governments should spend money on faster means of public transport. However, others think money should be spent on other priorities (such as the environment). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Doctors in many countries are saying that people are not getting enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this and how it can be addressed?

Many people believe that social networking websites such as FB and Instagram have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A report indicated that many children between 7 and 11 years old watch television and/ or play video games too much. How does the problem affect? what measures can be taken control of?

In many countries, students take a year gap after finishing school and work or travel during this period. Should students take a gap year before attending universities? What are the advantages and disadvantages of it?