The bar chart shows the divorce rates in two European countries from 2011 to 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The bar chart shows the divorce rates in two European countries from 2011 to 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
The bar chart depicts the proportions of divorced
partner
Fix the agreement mistake
partners
show examples
over a 4-
year
period, observed across two European nations between 2011 and 2015.
Over all
Correct your spelling
Overall
show examples
,
Sweden
was leading the percentage of divorced partners for 3 years,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
Finland
was surpassing
Sweden
at the end
of the stages.
According to
the chart in the first period,
Sweden
had a higher rate of divorced residents at 42%, than that
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Finland
at 38%. In the upcoming
year
,
Sweden
rose marginally by 5% to 49%,
in contrast
with
Finland
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
experienced
decline
Correct article usage
a decline
show examples
2
Change preposition
of 2
show examples
% from the previous
year
.
On the other hand
, there were changes over the next 3 years.
Sweden
started to decline gradually close to 48%, 45% and 38% respectively.
Additionally
, in the next 2
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
,
Finland
faced different changes, where it grew
consitently
Correct your spelling
consistently
constantly
by around 2% to about 39% and 41% in 2013 and 2014,
then
remained steadily
likewise
the previous
year
. In conclusion,
Sweden
and
Finland
witnessed gradual changes in 4 years, where
Finland
had a trend of steady
declined
Replace the word
decline
show examples
and marked the highest rates of divorce societies
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
41% , followed by
Sweden
the
Change preposition
with the
show examples
lowest proportion
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
38%
at the end
of the phases.
Submitted by pratiwi.fadhilah11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
Vocabulary: Replace the words sweden, finland, year with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • divorce rates
  • fluctuate
  • increase
  • decrease
  • peak
  • trough
  • trend
  • notable
  • significant
  • substantial
  • higher
  • lower
  • comparison
  • consistent
  • vary
  • percent
  • overall
What to do next:
Look at other essays: