Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest?

#gyms #lifestyle #popularity #world

Over the past decade, a sedentary

lifestyle

has become a prevalent and publicly recognized phenomenon

although

a wide range of fitness

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

has increasingly appeared in almost

Correct determiner usage

all area

show examples

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

However

, several

problems

. have resulted from

this

tendency and they Should be

tacked

Correct your spelling

tackled

show examples

by a number of effective Solutions from companies and

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

Change preposition

With

show examples

the popularity of a sedentary

lifestyle

among many people, several related

problems

can be anticipated. The main issue is that causes

umany

Correct your spelling

many

serious

illness

Fix the agreement mistake

illnesses

show examples

including obesity or

disease

heart.

This

is because

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

individuals frequently sit down overlong, leading to that

disease

. Another problem is that gets negative

For instance

when people. to mental health spend long hours sitting down and don't have regular exercise, It

makes to

Verb problem

causes

show examples

mental

disease

Change the noun form

diseases

show examples

such

as depression or anxiety.

Since endorphin

Change preposition

Endorphin

show examples

and Serotonin

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

are created out of doing exercise and

this

can help prevent mental issues. Since

such

issues are serious, the government and individuals should immediately take steps to address these

problems

. The first solution would be

run

Fix the infinitive

to run

show examples

a wide of campaigns and programs about maintaining a good

lifestyle

to avoid

sedentary

Correct article usage

a sedentary

show examples

lifestyle

The second measure would be

encourage

Fix the infinitive

to encourage

show examples

companies to build up plenty of competition or programs to

promote

Verb problem

encourage

show examples

their employees to have the habit doing

regularly

Change the word

regular

show examples

exercise In conclusion, there are various negative consequences of physical and mental

disease

and appropriate steps need to be taken to tackle these

problems

Submitted by okookk123456 on Fri Aug 09 2024

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Task Achievement

Your essay generally addresses the prompt but could be more detailed and specific in discussing the problems and solutions you mention. Try to provide more concrete examples and elaborate on your points.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to improve the logical flow of your sentences and paragraphs. Working on transitioning smoothly between ideas will make your essay easier to read and understand. Reading through your essay multiple times can help catch awkward phrasing or missing words.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is essential for good structure.

Task Achievement

You successfully identify both problems and solutions related to the issue of a sedentary lifestyle, showing a relevant response to the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

233 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary lifestyle
physical inactivity
health problems
weight gain
obesity
energy levels
chronic illnesses
mental health
productivity
focus
social isolation
exercise
physical fitness
active lifestyle
health benefits
physical health
mental well-being
leisure activities
regular physical activity
physical exercise
cardiovascular health
strength training
flexibility
endurance

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Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think it does not matter if a professional sportsman or sportswoman misbehaves on or off the field if they play well. What is your opinion about this?

In some parts of the world, it is increasingly popular to research the history of one’s own family. Is this a positive or negative development?

do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages on using social media to all ages

Some people think that the best way for the government to solve the problem of traffic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Do you agree or disagree with this idea?