Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages.

#countries #development #values #phenomenon

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Today, the development of economics has improved living standards

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and brought products, new technology and better living conditions.

While

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, during the process of

this

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, the lack of social values

also

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becomes a consideration. For

this

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phenomenon, I believe the drawbacks outweigh the benefits. On the one hand, there are several benefits to

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event.

Firstly

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, it refers to an increase in the quality of life or well-being of individuals or communities, because the improvement of the

economy

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can increase the individual's salaries, enhance the accommodation conditions, healthcare and education can be more common to the public.

Secondly

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, the advancement of technology leads to higher efficiency and productivity in people’s lives,

for example

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, the spread of the internet allows the collection of information and resources to be easier for employers.

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, the enrichment of the

economy

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will lead increase in employment, and enhance the activity of society. It can boost the independence of individuals.

On the other hand

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, the disadvantages of a growth

economy

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. Admittedly, as the development of the

economy

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, individualism and materialism often become dominant, the family bonds and communities are ignored.

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this

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may lead people to only focus on their personal profit and ignore teamwork and some responsibilities.

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, the overdevelopment of resources will cause environmental pollution, and using short-term profit to sacrifice the long-term balance of ecology can lead to big stress on the earth. Simultaneously, the inequality between the poor and the rich will become more serious.

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, it will reduce the connection between the social. In conclusion,

although

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economic expansion is very essential to the world, a negative impact on social stability and

overall

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well-being in the long run.

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, I believe that the drawbacks of

this

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event outweigh the benefits.

Submitted by 57025371 on Fri Aug 09 2024

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task achievement

The essay adequately addresses the task, however, some points need further elaboration or specific examples to fully support the argument. For instance, mentioning specific advancements in healthcare or education due to economic development could strengthen the response.

coherence cohesion

While the essay has a logical flow, some paragraphs can be structured more coherently. For example, the paragraph expressing the disadvantages could be more organized by grouping similar points together and providing clearer transitions.

coherence cohesion

Work on developing clear topic sentences and ensuring each paragraph maintains a central idea. This will improve the essay's overall readability and coherence.

structure

The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each part has a distinct purpose and helps in delivering the overall message.

task achievement

The writer successfully introduces both the advantages and disadvantages of economic development. There is a clear stance taken, which helps in making the argument strong.

13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

standard of living
economic development
social values
materialism
community welfare
sustainable technologies
environmental degradation
social stratification
social cohesion
economic status

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Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages.

In some cultures, children are told they can achieve anything if they work hard. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Today, there are more television channels than ever before. Some people think this leads to more choices for television viewers. Others, however, believe this causes the quality of television programmes to decline. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The Impact of Technology on Education and Learning

It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.