You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. • Say why he/she would not enjoy going to college • Explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her • Suggest types of job that would be for him/her

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Dear friend, I hope

this

Linking Words

letter finds you in the best of health and spirits. I am currently working at

restaurant

Add an article

a restaurant

the restaurant

show examples

as a waiter and I thought it would be a great opportunity to share my experiences with you. As a good friend of yours, I believe that nowadays gaining experience is more valuable

Linking Words

then

Correct your spelling

than

show examples

, getting

degree

Add an article

a degree

the degree

show examples

Therefore

Linking Words

, I can say you should

work

Use synonyms

with me and

also

Linking Words

you can earn a lot of money for yourself

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Because

last

Linking Words

year my plenty of friends

have chosen

Wrong verb form

chose

show examples

college and right now they all of them working with me. That’s

way

Correct your spelling

why

show examples

I recommend

work

Use synonyms

with me.

Firstly

Linking Words

, I would like to provide you with some information that might be helpful during your career.

Secondly

Linking Words

, if you are good at communication with all of the

customer

Fix the agreement mistake

customers

show examples

, you can get plenty of money

Linking Words

then

Correct your spelling

than

show examples

others,

Linking Words

that is

Verb problem

which

show examples

benefits your life.

Finally

Linking Words

, after

work

Use synonyms

two

Change preposition

for two

show examples

or three years, you might run your own business.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, if you do not desire to

Linking Words

this

Add a missing verb

do this

show examples

work

Use synonyms

, you can make

small

Correct article usage

a small

show examples

business.

For instance

Linking Words

: sell some kind of fruit, meal, balloons and abbreviation. Because you are young yet and

therefore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

works suitable for you. I hope you will be able to make it. Best regards, Ozod

omondavlat91Fri Aug 09 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Make sure to address each of the bullet points in the prompt more directly and explicitly. For example, explain clearly why you think your friend would not enjoy college.

coherence cohesion

Improve logical flow by organizing your points more clearly. You could follow a structure like: introduction, why not college, benefits of working, possible jobs, and a conclusion.

greeting and closing

The greeting and closing are appropriate and friendly, which adds a personal touch to the letter.

single idea per paragraph

Each paragraph contains a single main idea, making it easier for the reader to follow.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

208 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Real-world experience
Practical experience
Financial independence
On-the-job training
Student loan debt
Personal growth
Professional networking
Career development
Skilled workers
Job market
Career goals
Immediate income
Professional relationships
Market demand
Defining interests
Educational investments

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
increasing the similarity between nations, have beneficial effects for communities as well as some drawbacks. I think globalization has more positive effects, purchasing the same products with higher qualities such as cars, furniture, and clothes regardless of the geographical location is improving human lifestyles in many ways.
7
band
Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Many people believe that reading books is far more beneficial for children than watching television or playing computer games. Personally, I completely agree with this opinion and will analyze the issue in the following essay.
8
band
Scientists predict in the near future, car will be driven by computers, not people. Why? Do you think it is a positive or negative development
In modern times, information technology plays an integral role in our daily lives, significantly impacting our homes, work environments, and even transportation. Some researchers forecast that unmanned automobiles will become popular in the future. In my view, this development will bring more benefits than harm. Therefore, the reasons will be discussed in the following paragraphs alongside the advantages of them
6.5
band
In modern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?
Nowadays, children spend more time with their friends than with their families. This change has occurred because children do not want to feel left out amongst their peers and parents should not force children to stay home because they will resent their parents for it.
6
band
Advertising has become an unavoidable part of everyone’s life. Some say that advertising is a positive part of our lives while others say it is a negative one. Discuss both views and include your own opinion
Advertising has become a pervasive aspect of modern life. It has both supporters and critics, each offering compelling arguments about its effects on society. Many people argue that advertising has a positive effect on society, while others claim that advertising has negative consequences. In my opinion, advertising is a double-bladed sword. This essay will discuss both perspectives.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Scientists predict in the near future, car will be driven by computers, not people. Why? Do you think it is a positive or negative development

In modern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

Advertising has become an unavoidable part of everyone’s life. Some say that advertising is a positive part of our lives while others say it is a negative one. Discuss both views and include your own opinion