Classmates are a more important influence than parents on a child’s success in school. Do you agree with this statement? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

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It is widely argued that peers have more strong control than
parents
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over the success of the
children
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. In my view, I strongly disagree with
this
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statement, since parental contribution is far more important than friendship owing to
instill
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instil
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moral
values
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among
children
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by
parents
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as well as
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continuous guidance. Commencing with the most salient reason why I consider parent influence more than colleagues.
This
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is because
children
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can learn ethical
values
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under the
the
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apply
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shadow of
parents
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. Skills
such
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as honesty, reverence, sympathy, punctuality and management of money are
prerequisite
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prerequisites
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for survival which can only be learnt
while
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being in the company of
parents
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,
whereas
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these
values
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cannot be
practice
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practised
show examples
with peers company, who do not have enough knowledge about
such
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values
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.
Thus
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, the more juveniles stay closer to their guardians, the more they
equip
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are equipped
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with skills which are crucial for their academic achievement.
On the other hand
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, another worth considering reason is to assist them with enough guidance throughout their life regardless of time
constraint
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constraints
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.
Since
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Parents
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parents
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not only correct their
children
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at every walk of life by monitoring them but
also
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give them ongoing support both financially and emotionally, resulting in strengthening their path
of
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to
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success.
For instance
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,
parents
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often assist their juveniles in
decision making
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decision-making
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regarding the selection of academic streams and career goals by using their past experience which clearly
help
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helps
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them to opt for the right domains, and resultantly, they reach the zenith of success.
Hence
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, parental influence is undeniable in
children
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’s holistic development.
To conclude
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, even though
classmates
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classmates'
classmate's
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action makes a big impact
in
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on
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children
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’s lives, I think
children
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would remain bereft of moral
values
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and support unless they
are residing
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resided
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with their
parents
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.
Submitted by abdulahad08600 on

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task achievement
Your essay successfully addresses the topic and provides a clear response. However, try to ensure that your ideas are more comprehensively expressed. For example, delve deeper into how parents instill moral values and provide continuous guidance.
coherence cohesion
To improve clarity and coherence, avoid repetition. For instance, the repeated use of "juveniles" can be replaced with synonyms. Additionally, ensure consistent use of vocabulary and phrases. Avoiding wordiness will enhance readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your argument well.
task achievement
You provided specific reasons to support your viewpoint, which makes your argument more compelling.
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