Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both the views and state your own opinion.
One
school of thought thinks that rather than investing less Use synonyms
time
in earning Use synonyms
money
to get more free Use synonyms
time
, individuals should spend more Use synonyms
time
towards Use synonyms
work
to earn more income even if they have less free Use synonyms
time
. In my opinion, people should do enough Use synonyms
work
so that they can have enough Use synonyms
money
to cover their necessities, but not on the cost of relationships.
With regard to doing more Use synonyms
work
with the aim to have more Use synonyms
money
so that Use synonyms
one
can bring as much as comforts in their Use synonyms
life
to improve their lifestyle, Use synonyms
nevertheless
, they have left with a small amount of Linking Words
time
to spend with their family, and for their own well-being is considered a wise decision by many people in societies who believe that Use synonyms
money
is the most important factor to bring happiness to their Use synonyms
lives
. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, individual people think that having Linking Words
luxuries
in Use synonyms
life
promotes enjoyment and satisfaction in their Use synonyms
lives
, and the Use synonyms
luxuries
can bring only Use synonyms
by
a surplus amount of Change preposition
apply
money
, Use synonyms
therefore
, individuals should think less about spare Linking Words
time
, and do Use synonyms
work
as much as they can so that they can buy Use synonyms
luxuries
in their Use synonyms
lives
which make them and their families happy.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, Linking Words
one
part of society considered that Use synonyms
one
should have a good amount of Use synonyms
time
to spend with their loved ones in spite of spending a major proportion of their Use synonyms
lives
just doing jobs to earn Use synonyms
money
. Undeniably, Use synonyms
money
is a necessity in everyone's Use synonyms
life
, but it does not guarantee happiness in Use synonyms
life
, which a person can get from his loved ones. If Use synonyms
one
can have enough Use synonyms
money
through his Use synonyms
work
that person can meet all the needs of his Use synonyms
life
and family members, Use synonyms
then
a person should not unnecessarily waste their Linking Words
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
in
earning more and more monetary rewards, because having Change preposition
apply
luxuries
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
the
temporary enjoyment and satisfaction, the real-Correct article usage
a
life
contentment comes through good deeds Use synonyms
such
as helping others, charity, build a strong bond with family members that will provide the long-term fulfilment.
In conclusion, Linking Words
although
Linking Words
money
is required to enjoy a good Use synonyms
life
, Use synonyms
however
, putting all their Linking Words
time
into Use synonyms
work
, and less Use synonyms
time
for their own and family Use synonyms
life
and Use synonyms
also
for society, I believe, is not the right path for a good Linking Words
life
, because having caring and loving relationships are the utmost need of Use synonyms
life
that earn with good behaviour, by giving Use synonyms
time
to them, not merely only with the Use synonyms
money
.Use synonyms
Submitted by kanwalkaur05 on
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task achievement
Your response effectively addresses the task, but ensure that each paragraph clearly develops a single main idea to improve coherence.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader through the argument.
task achievement
Strengthen your essay by including specific, relevant examples to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and well-presented introduction and conclusion, which effectively frames your discussion.
task achievement
You have presented balanced views on both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are generally clear and comprehensive, with a logical flow in your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.