Some educationalists think that international exchange visits benefits teenagers at the school. To what extent do advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In
this
fast-paced world that we presently reside in, the phenomenon of student exchange
in terms of short course study has garnered popularity in recent years. Notwithstanding my unwavering support for this
notion, that it allows the youths to broaden their experience and networking, it is imperative to acknowledge that this
case may also
entail certain drawbacks, encompassing potential health
and safety
concerns.
On the one hand, the existing substantial support for the notion of international exchange
visits can jeopardize youngsters’ health
and safety
, since they will dwell in divergent environments. Transitioning health
issues arises
Correct subject-verb agreement
arise
due to
changes in climate, diet, and stress; meanwhile, safety
concerns, such
as political instability or distinct safety
standards in the host country, pose detrimental repercussions. Students exchange
in Sudan, for example
, have to grapple with the political conflicts that causing civil war. As a result
, administrations all around the world exerted their power to repatriate their citizens from Sudan immediately after the war occurred in 2023.
On the other hand
, I fervently advocate international short courses owing to their potential to yield a myriad of benefits for adolescents. Those who opt for this
study program stand to further
not only in terms of personal growth experiences but also
in acquiring gold-plated networking. For instance
, it affords young adults the opportunity to delve into international communities, while
simultaneously allowing them to amass global exposure, shaping their future aspirations. Moreover
, these programs enhance essential aptitude skills as students navigate real-world experiences, boosting their confidence and fostering mutual respect in professional settings.
Taking the aforementioned into consideration, while
it is crucial to recognize the potential health
and safety
risks associated with student exchange
programs, the advantages, such
as enriching experiences and access to international networks, often outweigh these demerits. Furthermore
, the benefits of international exchange
visits make them a worthwhile endeavour for young people. So paramount is that the governments should enact regulations to ensure the safety
of students abroad.Submitted by megyfebryanisyah on
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task achievement
Elaborate more on the disadvantages to provide a more balanced view. Currently, the disadvantages are discussed but not in as much depth as the advantages.
task achievement
Improve the clarity and conciseness of your ideas. Some sentences are wordy or contain overly complex vocabulary which may obscure meaning.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Some transitions between ideas can be smoother for better cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Minor grammatical errors need to be addressed for a more polished writing style.
coherence cohesion
Strong introduction and conclusion effectively contextualize and summarize your arguments.
task achievement
Good use of relevant examples that bolster your points well.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.