Some people think that paying tax is their only duty, while others believe that we have more responsibilities towards society. Discuss both sides and give your opinion?

Some individuals think that paying
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
is their only work,
whereas
others believe that we have more fundamental responsibilities towards
community
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the community
show examples
. I believe that paying
tax
alone is not sufficient, as there are other aspects that should be taken into account.
To begin
with, nowadays, many countries
place
Verb problem
have
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new
law
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laws
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of
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on
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taxes, and
its
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it's
it is
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obligatory for all
citizens
to pay
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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on time. So, locals believe that they have only
one
duty that’s to pay
tax
only.
Government
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The government
show examples
planned to improve several places in different cities, to improve inhabitants living situations.
For example
, in the United Arab Emirates, there are multiple nationalities who live for personal business and
other
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others
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for jobs,
no
Correct word choice
and no
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one
thinks about
improvement
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the improvement
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of the
country
except the native
citizens
.
Furthermore
, individuals will not bother themselves to make any changes in the city or
country
.
On the other hand
, some people believe that they have more responsibilities rather than just paying taxes. Obeying the laws and protecting the environment
are
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is
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one
of the
citizens
' duties. I agree that
citizens
have more duties
except
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than
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paying taxes.
Citizens
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Citizens'
Citizen's
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responsibilities
also
involve respecting each other and supporting the
country
.
For example
, In Dubai
city
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city,
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most people live friendly most likely as
a
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apply
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one
family.
In other words
, Dubai has a clear vision for
next
Correct article usage
the next
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thirty years from now, not only paying
tax is
Wrong verb form
taxes
show examples
enough to see the future of the city,
to
Correct word choice
but to
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reach
this
view every person should help the
government
to improve in many sectors.
For instance
, in 2018 the UAE passport became the most powerful passport in the world, and Burj Khalifa was awarded the tallest building in the world, and these all happened with the help and effort of the people and
Government
. In culmination, paying
tax
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taxes
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only is not enough to make
change
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a change
show examples
in the
country
, I do believe
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals should help the
government
to achieve their goal.
Submitted by saeeddjcj80 on

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task response
You have presented both sides of the argument and given your opinion, which is good. However, your essay would benefit from expanding on the reasons why paying taxes alone is not sufficient and why having additional responsibilities is essential.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is mostly clear, with a logically structured introduction, body, and conclusion. However, some of your ideas could be developed further for better clarity. Aim to provide more detailed reasoning and examples for each point you make.
task response
While you have included examples, try to include a wider variety of specific, relevant examples to strengthen your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing and provide more depth to your points.
task response
Your introduction effectively sets up the discussion on the two viewpoints regarding paying taxes and additional responsibilities. This provides a strong foundation for the essay.
coherence cohesion
You have correctly included a conclusion that summarizes your main points and gives your opinion on the topic, which helps to tie your essay together.
coherence cohesion
Your essay shows a clear attempt to organize your ideas logically, with separate paragraphs for each viewpoint and a conclusion that wraps up your argument nicely.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fiscal responsibilities
  • state's revenues
  • societal structures
  • moral and societal duties
  • community service
  • environmental sustainability
  • democratic processes
  • efficiency
  • utilizing tax revenues
  • social issues
  • redundant
  • active citizenship
  • civic engagement
  • personal and collective efforts
  • societal enhancement
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