Today, more people are living longer after they retire from work. What problems will it cause for individuals and society? What can be done to prevent it

It argue that the most significant purpose of
education
is to
derelop
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develop
numans
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humans
human
lives
. I
competely
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completely
agree with
this
opinion and I think that
education
#
flays
Verb problem
is
show examples
a major tale in
humans
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humans'
human's
show examples
daily
lives
. It is
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believed
belived
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believed
that most scientific developments and inventions
weve
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we've
because of learning.
For instance
, nowadays People are learning Several things in
education
. That
lead
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leads
show examples
to
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increase
increased
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an increas
show examples
increas
Correct your spelling
increase
humans
ask creativity and productivity.
Moreover
, I think
ons's
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one's
the person have move
knowledeg
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knowledge
ons's
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one's
tre will be
succesful
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successful
in
diffrentes
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different
sides on his /her life.
However
, I believe that science would
advanced
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be advanced
advance
show examples
humans
Fix the agreement mistake
human
show examples
lives
In conclusion, the significant
gole
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goal
of science that to increases improving
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives
. I strongly think that
education
is a central element to
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develop
develope
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developing
humans
and t
Submitted by dinaum063 on

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task achievement
Focus on clearly addressing both parts of the prompt. Ensure you explain the problems of longer life expectancy and offer viable solutions.
task achievement
Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of your ideas by using clear paragraphing.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within it contribute to that idea.
coherence cohesion
Include a proper introduction and conclusion to frame your essay.
task achievement
Your essay provides a basic response to the prompt.
task achievement
You attempted to give reasons and examples to support your points.
task achievement
You have some good ideas related to education and its role in human life.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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