In many countries, school-age children are spending their free time in doing homework. Is it a good or bad thing? What is your opinion? Give examples to support your view.

There are multiple universities which offer programs related to ‘Public Health’ not only in Colombia but
also
in Australia.
Nevertheless
, the curriculum offered by
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Torren University has a perfect balance between its core subjects and its specializations with some topics which definitely are not available in other institutions. First of all, there are 5 core subjects which thoroughly fit a relationship among social, cultural and
behavioral
Change the spelling
behavioural
show examples
factors, environmental issues, economic management in healthcare, and epidemiology. What is more,
this
‘Graduate Diploma’ has five specialization subjects which allow us to focus on improving specific skills. From my perspective, the most interesting electives are ‘Digital Health and Informatics’, ‘Biostatistics’, and ‘Health Policy and Advocacy’.
Finally
, it should be emphasized that everybody has to know how to apply cutting-edge technological techniques.
Therefore
, what is most appealing to me about the program at Torrens University is the implementation of basic knowledge and emerging digital tools.
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on

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task achievement
Try to elaborate more on how the curriculum at Torrens University balances core subjects and specializations with unique topics compared to other institutions.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is concise, but summarizing the main points briefly would be beneficial to strengthen it.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents clear and comprehensive ideas about why the curriculum at Torrens University is advantageous.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure is maintained throughout the text.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic performance
  • time management
  • stress and burnout
  • mental health
  • holistic development
  • extracurricular activities
  • parental involvement
  • socioeconomic disparities
  • reinforces
  • understanding
  • valuable skill
  • engage
  • inequitable
  • resources
  • support
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