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Band 1

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss ofparticular species ofplants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words

#people #time #loss #ofparticular #species #ofplants #animals
My interest in studying the ‘Graduate Diploma of Public Health’ at Torrens University comes from different reasons. First of all, the role of Public Health is crucial to manage and control healthcare systems
as well as
 introduce health promotion and disease prevention policies.
Secondly
, it is required to dive deeper
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 healthcare research implementing public health techniques to precisely implement methodologies and obtain more accurate results.
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that all the essay's parts are effectively structured. A strong introduction outlining your intention to discuss both views and a clear conclusion summarizing your findings and opinion are crucial.
task response
While your ideas are relevant, try to expand on each point and back up your arguments with specific examples. This will make your essay more compelling and demonstrate a thorough engagement with the topic.
task response
The essay tackles the task of discussing both views, which showcases an understanding of the requirement.
coherence and cohesion
There is a clear progression of ideas which aids readability and shows a good logical structure.
task response
Your interest in studying Public Health is well conveyed and links back to the importance of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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