some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, most
people
are faced with the dilemma of whether they should compete more or cooperate more in their daily lives. I believe that a combination of both is an ideal strategy for them to improve their personal ability. On the one hand, increasing the number of competitions is beneficial to the development of society in terms of individual and collective. With regard to the former, the
competition
between staff and students encourages them to finish the
work
in a faster and better way, which enables them to arrange their time in a reasonable way and think about coming up with more creative ideas.
Therefore
, competitions help to improve
people
's abilities.
Moreover
,
competition
is good for the companies themselves.
That is
to say,
competition
can promote enterprises to enhance vitality, develop innovation ability, and ultimately boost the economy. All of those contribute to improvements in the society.
On the other hand
,
cooperation
can gain productivity improvements efficiently.
That is
to say,
cooperation
can effectively allocate everyone's
work
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that each
people
in the team can do the part that they are good at. What's more,
cooperation
can
also
enhance the communication skills of each team member. To be specific,
people
need to express their opinions clearly to team members, and
therefore
, they can have better communication skills. In my opinion, competing with each other makes participants more willing to
work
better
while
cooperation
can improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
efficiency. In short, I believe both
competition
and
cooperate
Replace the word
cooperation
show examples
are
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
to humanity at their
work
.
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task achievement
While your essay addresses both views and provides your own opinion, try to elaborate more on specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Specific examples can make your points more convincing and relatable.
coherence cohesion
Ensure seamless transitions between paragraphs to make the flow of your essay smoother. This will enhance the logical structure and make it easier for readers to follow your arguments.
task achievement
The essay presents a comprehensive discussion of both views and provides a clear opinion, fulfilling the task response criteria effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant, giving the essay a strong start and a satisfactory closure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • excel
  • outperform
  • advancements
  • academic standards
  • work ethic
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • harmonious
  • supportive
  • collaborative learning
  • social skills
  • communication skills
  • sense of community
  • collective goals
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