.More and more people today are spending large amounts of money on their appearance in order to look younger. Why do people want to look younger? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
It
is goes
without saying that every human Change the verb form
goes
beings
in the world Change to a singular noun
being
have
an enormous desire to be attractive, gorgeous and of course look young. Nowadays, we have a tendency among Correct subject-verb agreement
has
individuals
in senior age, who spend a lot of money in order to change
their appearance
considerably. Let me examine both sides of this
issue before making a concrete decision about ramifications
of Correct article usage
the ramifications
this
trend.
First and foremost, we live in the 21st century and undoubtedly it provides us with a multitude of privileges in comparison with our ancestors. If citizens of urban and cosmopolitan places have a
thoughts and intentions to Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
change
their body
or Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
face
Correct subject-verb agreement
faces
due to
the
dissatisfaction Correct pronoun usage
their
of
it, they can easily visit plastic surgeons and they will Change preposition
with
change
their overall
look noticeably. As we know, expenditures
of Correct article usage
the expenditures
individuals
for visiting qualified and professional specialists cost a lot of money and they can even take out a loan. Obviously, there are a multitude of circumstances why exactly individuals
disburse a considerable amount of cash. To cite an example, citizens cannot accept the fact of changing appearance
with getting older. It leads to psychological problems like anxiety, depression and unending comparison with other individuals
who look younger. As evidence, according to
American
Society of Correct article usage
the American
plastic surgeons
even if Correct your spelling
Plastic Surgeons
individuals
look pretty they want to do injections of botox, blepharoplasty, rhinoplasty, abdominoplasty and other
.
Fix the agreement mistake
others
Last
, but not least there are a lot of predictable beneficial and negative consequences of spending money to change
appearance
. Some people cannot stop doing surgery, trying
new procedures on them. Correct word choice
and trying
Subsequently
, their facial transformations lead to drastic and overwhelmingly unaltered changes with which they lost
their identity as Wrong verb form
lose
a
human beings and their self-perception will suffer. Correct article usage
apply
However
, if inhabitants pay attention to their appearance
, health, tiny
changes Correct word choice
and tiny
on
their Change preposition
in
body
it can be Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
magnificent
way to avoid Add an article
a magnificent
feeling
of old age. Add an article
the feeling
a feeling
In
instance, Change preposition
For
individuals
will visit fitness clubs, spa procedures as well as
cosmetologists and they will look fresh and younger.
To sum up
, it is a double-edged sword and there are versatile reasons why citizens give preference
to look young. From my own perspective, I suppose to Wrong verb form
prefer
thing
that drawbacks of Correct your spelling
think
this
issue tip the scales and I wholeheartedly believe that this
trend should be changed.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring the logical connection between ideas to improve the flow of your essay. Create clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This can strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases and information. Each paragraph should introduce new insights or examples that build upon the previous one.
task achievement
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing reasons people want to look younger and the positivity or negativity of the trend.
task achievement
A variety of vocabulary is used effectively, showcasing a strong command of the language.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both present and provide a clear framework for the essay.
Your opinion
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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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