Scientists believe that computers will become more intelligent than human beings. Some people find it is a positive trend while others think it is a negative development. Discuss both points and give your own opinion.

Opinions are divided on whether the fact that human intelligence will be surpassed by that of
computers
is beneficial or harmful.
Although
highly-intelligent
Correct your spelling
highly intelligent
show examples
computers
can assist humans in many ways, I am apprehensive about
this
development. Admittedly, many people champion the assistance of
super advanced
Add a hyphen
super-advanced
show examples
computers
, and justifiably so.
This
is because these machines could greatly improve productivity as they could eliminate human involvement in the course of production and work tirelessly 24/7.
However
, only employers seem to benefit from
this
,
while
countless jobs would be terminated, penalizing the most vulnerable section of the human population.
In addition
,
although
computers
with the ability to think critically and logically could help humans make objectively sound decisions,
this
would create over-dependence which would in turn have a stultifying effect on human intelligence.
Furthermore
, with
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
intelligence, robots may start to make their own decisions, posing an existential threat to humankind.
For example
, robots, with a certain set of beliefs and moral codes inserted, might decide
a
Correct word choice
whether a
show examples
group of people or a religion should be eradicated for the greater good of the human race. From a logical standpoint, humans are, in essence, destroying the environment for the sake of economic growth, so it is reasonable to worry that a robot might decide that the best course of action is to wipe out human existence to protect the environment. These risks are too big for anyone to take, rendering the brought forth development unwelcome. In conclusion, robotic engineering and AI technologies can surely enhance people’s quality of life, but the disadvantages of job losses, increased intellectual dependency on
computers
and potential existential threats posed to our own race can negate the aforementioned benefits.
Submitted by cohoctro12122007 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Strong opening and closing paragraphs are essential for framing your essay effectively, which you've done well. Keep structuring your essays similarly.
examples
While your main points are well-supported, occasionally providing more varied examples could further strengthen your argument.
ideas
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive. Continue providing thorough analysis, but ensure that every point ties back to the main argument consistently.
structure
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, which makes it easy to follow your argument.
balance
You provided a balanced discussion, considering both the positive and negative aspects of the topic before stating your own opinion.
framing
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame your essay, making your stance clear from the outset.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: