A rise in the use of mobile phones in the classroom by school children is severely impacting their concentration in class and overall education development. What are the causes of the problem and what can be done to solve it ?

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The increased

use

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of Mobile

phones

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in the classroom raises concern about its negative effects on

students

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concentration

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and

overall

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educational development.

This

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issue stems from factors

such

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as easy phone access, social

media

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addiction, and the role of irresponsible social

media

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companies

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However

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, viable solutions exist to tackle

this

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problem. One primary cause of diminished

concentration

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is the easy accessibility of mobile

phones

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. As Smartphones become more prevalent,

students

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find it easy to bring them into classrooms, resulting in constant distraction and hindering focused learning. Implementing educational settings can create an environment conducive to better

concentration

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For example

Linking Words

, school policies that restrict the

use

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of mobile

phones

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during class

time

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or ban their

use

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during the school day. Another major cause of distractions in classrooms is a result of the wide availability of social

media

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platforms

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. Young people today have social

media

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accounts with two or three social

media

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platforms

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at once.

This

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leads to multiple distractions and online

time

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when all of these are combined together.

However

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, action can be taken by social

media

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companies

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through the integration of features that reduce

time

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spent on these

platforms

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For instance

Linking Words

, screen

time

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tracking features, third-party apps like parental admin controls and well-being tools that encourage breaks from social

media

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platforms

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Moreover

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, holding social

media

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companies

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accountable for their role in perpetuating distractions is crucial. Encouraging transparency and ethical practices can lead to mitigating the negative impact of their

platforms

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students

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' educational experiences. In conclusion, the increased

use

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of mobile

phones

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in classrooms brings about challenges to

concentration

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and educational development, but pragmatic solutions exist. Implementing clear guidelines, enhancing digital literacy, and encouraging responsible practices among social

media

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companies

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are essential steps toward creating a harmonious learning environment for

students

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mubassirakolia78Tue Aug 13 2024

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task achievement

While your essay provides a good overall response to the task, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, you could delve a bit deeper into specific examples for better support of your main points. Providing more vivid and detailed examples can enhance your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is logically structured, and your introduction and conclusion are well-presented. However, to improve coherence, consider using more linking words and phrases to ensure smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs.

task achievement

Your introduction clearly states the issue and sets the stage for the subsequent discussion, while your conclusion neatly sums up the main points and suggests actionable solutions.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-organized, and each main point is clearly addressed in a separate paragraph. This logical structure makes your arguments easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
8
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

291 words

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A rise in the use of mobile phones in the classroom by school children is severely impacting their concentration in class and overall education development. What are the causes of the problem and what can be done to solve it ?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays e-books have become widely spread. Some people claim that e-books are bound to oust conventional ones, while others believe that traditional printed books will never be a thing of the past. Discuss both views and express your opinion.

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Today, more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult such as the Sahara desert or Antarctica. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. Do you agree or disagree? Write an essay (of about 300 words) to state your own opinion