People move to different location to live in. what are the reasons? is it a positive or negative development?

Centuries ago,when
travel
facilities were only in the budding stage, the human population stayed in
one
geographical location for the entire lifetime.
Whereas
, the mobility of communities is rapidly evolving now.
One
can say that
this
is a positive
development
despite some deleterious effects of
this
migration.
This
essay examines the causes of
this
movement of
people
and why it is a positive
development
.
To begin
with, the first and foremost reason for
people
to
travel
is that the distribution of the resources on the Earth is not uniform. When a community is saturated with population, the resources become scarce to thrive. So individuals with greater potential start to think about exploring far places.
For example
, unemployment in developing countries drives
people
to the West.
In addition
,
travel
facilities are much faster nowadays, which allows us to commute safely and faster.
For instance
, long ago, only ships were used to reach far shores, which consumed a lot of time and the health of the sailors was
also
at risk. But air
travel
has revolutionised the movement now and
people
move easily to different places.
One
can easily consider
this
as a positive indicator
although
there are some negatives. The reason, why
this
is so, is that a mobile community adds variety which enables the community to grow as a whole rather than being stagnant.
People
from different places nourish the culture. The best example of
this
is Britain. The migrant workforce has given an all-inclusive work culture in their NHS.
Hence
,
one
can say that it is a positive
development
.
To conclude
, mankind has always been wandering to find the best location to live in, and in the contemporary world, it has sped up a lot. It is a positive
development
and should be encouraged.
Submitted by krishnabalu1984 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve your score in coherence and cohesion, try to make sure each paragraph flows smoothly from one idea to the next. Using more linking words and phrases can help with this. Also, each main idea should be clearly separated into different paragraphs for better readability.
task achievement
Further elaborate on your main points to make your argument more compelling. Although your points are relevant, adding a few more specific examples and detailed explanations could strengthen your response.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frames your arguments.
task achievement
You provided relevant and specific examples that strengthened your arguments, such as the mention of unemployment in developing countries and the impact of air travel.

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