Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children, while others claim is has positive effects for children as they grow up. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #tv #children #effects

Many individuals think that watching

is useless for

children

while

others assume it has beneficial effects for

children

as they become mature.

This

writer’s opinion is the latter idea and the reasons why will be outlined in

this

essay. First of all, watching

is one of the most vital factors in helping

children

learn more knowledge. Parents can turn on programs which regard wild animals or world education displayed on the

Moreover

children

can watch some cartoons or animation for entertainment after studious hours. It will reduce stress and pressure on

children

and make them more interested in learning by television.

Furthermore

, watching

also

has a transmission of knowledge and a good grasp of various fields.

Consequently

children

will study their way through amusement. It is evident that many parents let their kids study

their

Change preposition

on their

show examples

own and rely on

programs

Correct article usage

the programs

show examples

shown. Another point that must be considered is that

children

can become addicted to watching

and start to ignore learning.

In addition

, some adults believe that it wastes much time with

children

instead

of sending them to extracurricular classes at night.

Besides

that,

children

may see toxic programs demonstrated

such

as violence or inappropriate video clips for babies.

Therefore

children

should watch

under the supervision of parents or install surveillance cameras in a home in order to find out immediately.

As a result

children

should manage their time and

content

Correct article usage

the content

show examples

they look at on

This

is the fact in Vietnam, some kids become naughty

due to

lack of guidance. In conclusion, watching

has a positive impact on babies if they are controlled thoughtfully.

Thus

, I think that the latter statement is the best opinion.

Thu May 30 2024

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task response

Your introduction effectively outlines the essay's structure. However, strive to be clearer and more concise in your thesis statement. While you states your opinion, make sure to fully address both views with equal depth.

task response

Expand on your main points with more specific and detailed examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could discuss specific TV programs that are educational or harmful for children.

coherence cohesion

Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs to enhance coherence and cohesion. While your ideas are logically structured, some paragraphs could benefit from more clear topic sentences and concluding sentences.

coherence cohesion

Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which aids in understanding your viewpoint.

task response

You touch upon several relevant aspects of the discussion on TV's impact on children, demonstrating a well-rounded thought process.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary behavior
unrealistic perceptions
creative pursuits
social development
emotional development
constructive content
screen time
parental guidance
critical thinking
active learning
age-appropriate
media literacy
family bonding
moderation
perceive

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Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children, while others claim is has positive effects for children as they grow up. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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You work for a small company. You need to arrange for some time off work. Write a letter to your employer. In your letter explain why you want to take time off work give details of how long you will be away suggest how you will make up for the lost time