🔶Nowadays more and more business meetings and business trainings are taking place online. 🔸Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
Due to
the rapid advancement in technology
many business Add a comma
technology,
meeting
are Change to a plural noun
meetings
organising
virtually.Wrong verb form
organised
Although
it has benefits such
as cost
efficeny
,Correct your spelling
efficiency
much
Correct word choice
and much
convienent
, Correct your spelling
convenient
however
, there are also
some drawbacks of this
new phenomina
, which will Correct your spelling
phenomena
phenomenon
be discuss
in upcoming paragraphs.
On the Change the verb form
be discussed
one
hand, by
taking place Change preposition
apply
virtually meeting
Replace the word
virtual meetings
it
leads to Correct pronoun usage
apply
reduce
Replace the word
a reduction
of
Change preposition
in
cost
meetings
. As if
Correct word choice
If
one
attending
Wrong verb form
attends
meeting
online the Correct article usage
a meeting
cost
of space and other thing
Change the wording
another thing
other things
such
as digital equipments
,Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
snacks
, would be decreased which can be added to Correct word choice
and snacks
employee's
pay cheque. Correct article usage
the employee's
Moreover
, not only for employers it also
gives benefit
to Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
worker
as they can work from home online, which can Fix the agreement mistake
workers
leads
to provide more Change the verb form
lead
felixibilty
for Correct your spelling
flexibility
one
. For instance
, in this
era of the
Correct article usage
apply
globolisation
, business Correct your spelling
globalisation
globalization
meetings
can take place online without leaving your own country which saves both time and money also
Correct word choice
and also
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
felixibilty
.
Correct your spelling
flexibility
On the other hand
, there is no doubt technology makes life easier for mankind . however
, there is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
also
some drawback
of attending Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
meetings
online, such
as lack of concentration especially in undeveloping
nations. To Correct your spelling
undeveloped
elobrate
it, Correct your spelling
illustrate
due to
lack of progress in some countries
internet connection is not that much reliable as Add a comma
countries,
relatively
to the developed Change the word
relative
one's
, which can result Change noun form
ones
as
distraction or Change preposition
in
loose
of connection Correct your spelling
loss
while
attending meetings
.In addition
, virtually
Change the word
virtual
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
also
might be little
risky for those who Correct article usage
a little
worked
on confidential Wrong verb form
work
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
such
as business revenue, profits and other legal documents. As it can be hacked by cyber experts.
In conclusion, undoubtly
, attending online Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
meeting
has benefits Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
Such
as cost
reduction, efficiency and many more. however
, it also
have
Change the verb form
has
few
Correct article usage
a few
disadvantage
which can be Change to a plural noun
disadvantages
counter
by technology in future.Wrong verb form
countered
Submitted by amarbatth367 on
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coherence cohesion
Focus on improving the logical flow between paragraphs. Make sure each paragraph connects smoothly to the next.
task achievement
Work on avoiding repetition of ideas. Try to introduce fresh points and perspectives in each paragraph.
task achievement
Pay attention to grammar and spelling errors. For example, 'loose of connection' should be 'loss of connection' and 'felixibilty' should be 'flexibility.'
task achievement
You provided clear examples to support your points, which adds strength to your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your arguments well.
task achievement
You raised relevant points on both the advantages and disadvantages of online business meetings, showing a balanced approach to the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?