IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

should people set personal goals, giving reasons for your views.

#people #goals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Is it really beneficial to set
goals
Use synonyms
? We have all set
goals
Use synonyms
 at least once in our lives. Our daily tasks or desire to get an A plus in academics. Are all of these to-do lists and journals really useful? I strongly believe it's beneficial to set personal
goals
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, from the way I see it,
goals
Use synonyms
 are a helpful outline of what to focus on. It shows the steps, and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 us manage our time.
For instance
Linking Words
, that goal for an A plus we know to work hard to achieve it.
Besides
Linking Words
 that in my view, it's clear that
goals
Use synonyms
 motivate
people
Use synonyms
 to accomplish their objectives. Knowing what you desire to get, like a dream career we want and strive for it.
Lastly
Linking Words
, I believe it inevitably makes life more enjoyable. We feel we have a purpose in life. Personal
goas
Correct your spelling
goals
show examples
 have a personal attachment and
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 happy to follow their dreams.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I vehemently believe it is beneficial for
people
Use synonyms
 to have
goals
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 should set
goals
Use synonyms
 as it helps them focus,
motivate
Correct subject-verb agreement
motivates
show examples
 them to achieve
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 and makes life enjoyable.
Submitted by maryamshafeeq on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While your main points are clear and relevant, providing more specific examples can strengthen your argument. For instance, you might include a personal anecdote or reference to a well-known figure who has achieved success through goal-setting.
coherence cohesion
Consider refining the logical structure of your essay to ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Using more cohesive devices like 'Firstly, Secondly, Moreover, Furthermore' can enhance readability.
task achievement
Try to expand your ideas more comprehensively. For example, explain more deeply how setting goals can lead to an enjoyable life or how it offers a sense of purpose.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame your argument.
task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the prompt, addressing the main points of why goal setting is beneficial.
coherence cohesion
You have used transition words effectively to guide the reader through your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: