Many countries today are experiencing high levels of migration from rural areas to cities. What are the causes of this trend, and what effects does it have on the existing city dwellers?
Nowadays, in many parts of the
world
the population of Add a comma
world,
cities
is increasing in
Change preposition
as
the
result of leaving the Correct article usage
a
villages
toward them. This
trend has main causes, and also
the
considerable damaging effects on urbanization.
The first reason that people prefer to live in Correct article usage
apply
cities
than rural areas is the lack educational
centers in Change preposition
of educational
countryside
. Correct article usage
the countryside
For example
, some Iranian students who live in villages
must commute to cities
to study in various grades from elementary to university in different climate
Fix the agreement mistake
climates
due to
the shortage of suitable facilities. Moreover
, income in outback
is limited to special jobs relevant to Add an article
the outback
villages
which often are inadequate, and those jobs are not permanent, such
as agriculture which is a seasonal job. Thus
, they do not have great chances as same as city residents in terms of earning money. Lastly
, live
in a multicultural environment of Wrong verb form
living
cities
appeals to bucolics because it provides opportunities to face with other side of life, and learn new lifestyles from others.
On the other hand
, the city dwellers will be faced with various problems by the extensive migration such
as a drastic rise in noise and air pollution. Furthermore
, the competition on
job vacancies Change preposition
for
is
increased enormously because the people who live in Verb problem
has
country sides
attempt harder Correct your spelling
the countryside
for
Change preposition
to
improvement
their economic status. Replace the word
improve
In addition
, the overcrowding of cities
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
on
accommodation rents. Change preposition
apply
For example
, if the requests of
housing go up, the landlords will prefer to hire houses out Change preposition
for
in
Change preposition
at
upper
prices rather than Correct word choice
higher
the
past.
In conclusion, Change preposition
in the
due to
the fact that,
the countryside is becoming empty Remove the comma
apply
by
migration, the governments should promote the privileges of rural life through media, and allocate some budgets for developing the quality of life in Change preposition
of
villages
.Submitted by raha.roham1994 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay responds well to the task by addressing both the causes and effects of migration from rural areas to cities. However, expanding a bit more on the explanations and providing more variety in examples could strengthen the task achievement.
task achievement
To improve clarity and comprehensiveness, ensure varied sentence structures and link ideas more effectively. Some points were repetitive, and others needed elaboration.
coherence cohesion
Use more transitional words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly. Varied sentence structures will help maintain reader interest and improve the essay's flow.
coherence cohesion
Provide a clearer structure by equally weight the causes and effects in your paragraphs. Also, ensure each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea.
task achievement
The essay covers the two main parts of the prompt thoroughly: causes of rural-to-urban migration and its effects on city dwellers.
task achievement
Examples provided are relevant and support the main points. This adds value to the arguments presented.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in providing a complete and rounded argument.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical and each paragraph transitions well into the next, making it easy to follow the writer's line of thought.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!