IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

More and more plastic is polluting the city, countryside and ocean. What are the problems caused by plastic waste? What measures should be taken to solve these problems?

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The amount of
plastic
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 thrown away in the countryside and ocean is increasing significantly.
This
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 essay will explain the problem and key factors to remedy the situation; by adopting a carrot-and-stick approach to citizens.
To begin
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 with the problem, numerous
plastic
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 materials can be seen in the
sea
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.
For example
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, containers, broken toys and
bags
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, have a serious effect on marine life. Research recently conducted by the Ministry of Environment in Japan discovered that the
sea
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 turtles in Japan are facing the danger of extinct because of
plastic
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bags
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. These turtles are likely to eat
plastic
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bags
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 accidentally when they search for their prey in the
sea
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. These
plastic
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 materials make turtles not to breathe, which causes death in the worst case. If
this
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 trend continues, marine creatures will have difficulty living in the
sea
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 around Japan. To remedy
this
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 situation, we should provide incentives and deterrents to reduce
plastic
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bags
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. For the former, it is a practical measure to introduce a tax deduction. Customers can receive these benefits when they use eco-friendly
bags
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 at supermarkets
instead
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 of
plastic
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bags
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. For the latter,
in contrast
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, the government should make a severe fine for illegal waste.
Although
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 now residents are not punished strictly when they throw away
plastic
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bags
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 on the road,
this
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 fine can change their attitude. If police officers see citizens who make illegal dumping, they must pay an expensive fine, 300,000 yen,
for instance
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.
As a result
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, these measures play a vital role in reducing
plastic
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 waste. In conclusion, since there are current issues caused by
plastic
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 waste, we must struggle to solve
this
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 problem by using incentive and punishment measures.

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task achievement
Try to add more specific examples and broaden your scope to include other parts of the world, not just Japan.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving transitions between paragraphs for enhanced coherence.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and well-stated.
task achievement
The main points are supported adequately with relevant details and examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay is logically organized and maintains a clear structure.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • pollution
  • ecosystems
  • microplastics
  • degradation
  • contamination
  • wildlife
  • health risks
  • financial resources
  • food chain
  • visual appeal
  • ingestion
  • entanglement
  • urban areas
  • natural landscapes
  • waste management
  • sustainability
  • recycling
  • biodegradable
  • public awareness
  • legislation
  • regulation
  • single-use plastics
What to do next:
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