It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives

It is considered to be of great importance for individuals to take risks in

professional

Correct pronoun usage

their professional

show examples

and personal

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

. In my opinion, taking risks in both aspects of life holds a great deal of benefits which includes personal growth and professional opportunities.

However

, I

also

believe life is uncertain and taking calculated risks is essential.

Submitted by Xyz person on Wed Aug 14 2024

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task achievement

To improve, provide clear and detailed examples to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more compelling.

coherence cohesion

Work on creating a more organized structure for your essay. This can be achieved by outlining your main points and supporting them with relevant details and examples.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Using linking words and phrases can help with this.

task achievement

You have clearly stated your opinion and introduced the main points of your essay.

coherence cohesion

The language used is clear and easy to understand, which makes your argument accessible.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

54 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh disadvantages?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

In today’s digital age, anyone with a smartphone can capture and share photographs. this accessibility to photography diminishes the value of professional photographers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The best way to help developing countries is to give them financial aid. Write an essay either agreeing or disagreeing with this statement. Suggest alternatives to this policy. v.1

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many options. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Many people say that we have developed into a “throw-away” culture, because we are filling up our environment with so many plastic bags and rubbish that we cannot fully dispose of. To what extent do you agree with this opinion and what measures can you recommend reducing this problem ?