19 .As the world has become technological advance, computer are replacing more and more jobs that maybe lose because of computer. Discuss at lear one problem that may result.

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In the epoch of globalization, the technology has been integrated in many sectors. It plays a vital role in enhancing

work

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

computers

Use synonyms

replacing more jobs and individuals can lose their jobs because of

this

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technology. In

this

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essay, I will elaborate on

this

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issue and how to tackle it.

To begin

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with, a wide range of companies are managed by

computers

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. It replaced humans in many sectors.

For instance

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, car factories are utilizing

computers

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and robots for car fabrication. The owners of these companies assume that robots can

work

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swiftly, smoothly and precisely.

Moreover

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computers

Use synonyms

can not be exhausted or bored during

work

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. It will

also

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not

blaming from

Wrong verb form

blame

show examples

the wages.

Thus

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, the scale of the

computer

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is higher recently.

Finally

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, these machines can

work

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under rough circumstances and for a long period.

Furthermore

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, there are a lot of cons

due to

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the

computer

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Firstly

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, if it is not well secure, it will be hacked.

Hence

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, anyone will be able to ruin the

work

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. Moving

further

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, it needs regular maintenance. Over time the

computer

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can be upgraded and

this

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imposes more currency with companies. Ultimately, the proportion of jobless individuals will be skyrocketed.

This

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will reflect in the society and the economy. One of the sparked examples is Taiwan. The government made everything

work

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computer

Use synonyms

Linking Words

Correct word choice

and as

show examples

a result, the percentage of destitute citizens increased and they are suffering. In conclusion, there will be a debate in

this

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argument.

However

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computers

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can be imposed in minor

jobsjobs

Correct your spelling

jobs

and major jobs for people. Both of them are completing each other.

mohannadsmeWed Aug 14 2024

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introduction conclusion present

The introduction accurately identifies the main issue and outlines the purpose of the essay. However, it would benefit from being a bit more concise and clearer in presenting the main points to be discussed.

complete response

The essay touches on several relevant issues related to computer automation and job loss, but it would be stronger with more specific examples and deeper analysis. Particularly, citing more than one country or industry would add to the depth and comprehensiveness of the response.

logical structure

The essay's logical structure is generally clear, but some points could be better organized for smoother flow. Consider using more transitional phrases to connect ideas and ensuring each paragraph has a clear main point that supports the thesis statement.

introduction conclusion present

The essay effectively starts with a relevant introduction and concludes with a summarizing statement, which wraps up the discussion appropriately.

relevant specific examples

The examples provided, such as the use of robots in car factories, help illustrate the points being made and add credibility to the argument.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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19 .As the world has become technological advance, computer are replacing more and more jobs that maybe lose because of computer. Discuss at lear one problem that may result.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a problem.What are the causes of this and wha actions can be taken to solve this problem?

Some people say it is important to keep your home and work tidy with everything organized and in the correct places, what is your opinion about it?

Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

some country pay extremely high salaries for people. Some people believe that the country must not do that and make a limit for the salaries. Do you agree or disagree.

in some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. what problems are causing ? what measures could be taken to counter this situation?