Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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this

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contemporary era,

people

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finding solutions to their health problems

instead

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of visiting professionals are increasing effortlessly. In my opinion,

this

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would have a negative impact on both society and individuals.

Firstly

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, internet and the technology are easily accessible to anyone in the world at a minimal cost. As we lead forward in developing new and creative solutions for the betterment of society, we are

also

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losing track of its consequences.

For instance

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, nowadays more advanced medical-related mobile applications are being developed and launched.

As a result

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people

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use it to find causes and cures for diseases like uploading images of skin rashes and the application recommending some ointments to use

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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This

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solution might work for some and not for

others

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. Because it depends on various factors like skin type, medical history, and allergy to some chemicals. Few

people

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use it to avoid paying doctors as they charge for it

whereas

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, the application gives it for free.

Secondly

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people

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take suggestions from

others

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like neighbours, relatives, or friends who have similar medical histories. These might have cured them but it does not have to be the same for

others

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For example

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people

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taking

such

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suggestions from friends or

others

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might end up in much worse scenarios having some probiotic tablets or drinks

while

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having a fever might have cured some adults if the same is carried out for children or aged

people

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it might cause adverse effects

because

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because of

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every human as

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the

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different metabolic mechanism.

To conclude

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, knowing an alternative medicine would be good enough until we keep it as secondary thoughts and discuss it with professionals to proceed with it or not. If

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is ignored to escape from paying them or to save time from visiting.

Then

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there would be a great negative impact on oneself.

nlchiranth11Thu Aug 15 2024

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introduction

Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the essay, but some phrases could be clearer. Instead of 'increasing effortlessly,' consider 'increasing significantly.'

supported main points

Ensure each paragraph addresses a single main idea with relevant support. Some sentences were slightly unclear; revising them will ensure your points are more effectively communicated.

relevant specific examples

While your examples are relevant, make sure they are detailed enough to fully support your argument. Adding more real-life instances or statistics could make your points more compelling.

conclusion

Your conclusion wraps up the essay nicely, summarizing the potential negative impacts succinctly.

task response

The essay covers the topic well and discusses both technological and social influences on people's health choices.

logical structure

You have organized your ideas logically, and each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.

13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
conventional medicine
health problems
treatments
doctor
positive development
negative development
dissatisfaction
additional choices
options
proven
proper regulation
safety
effectiveness
holistic approach
integration
beliefs
preferences

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