You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

In
this
contemporary era,
people
finding solutions to their health problems
instead
of visiting professionals are increasing effortlessly. In my opinion,
this
would have a negative impact on both society and individuals.
Firstly
, internet and the technology are easily accessible to anyone in the world at a minimal cost. As we lead forward in developing new and creative solutions for the betterment of society, we are
also
losing track of its consequences.
For instance
, nowadays more advanced medical-related mobile applications are being developed and launched.
As a result
,
people
use it to find causes and cures for diseases like uploading images of skin rashes and the application recommending some ointments to use
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
This
solution might work for some and not for
others
. Because it depends on various factors like skin type, medical history, and allergy to some chemicals. Few
people
use it to avoid paying doctors as they charge for it
whereas
, the application gives it for free.
Secondly
,
people
take suggestions from
others
like neighbours, relatives, or friends who have similar medical histories. These might have cured them but it does not have to be the same for
others
.
For example
,
people
taking
such
suggestions from friends or
others
might end up in much worse scenarios having some probiotic tablets or drinks
while
having a fever might have cured some adults if the same is carried out for children or aged
people
it might cause adverse effects
because
Add the preposition
because of
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every human as
Add an article
a
the
show examples
different metabolic mechanism.
To conclude
, knowing an alternative medicine would be good enough until we keep it as secondary thoughts and discuss it with professionals to proceed with it or not. If
this
is ignored to escape from paying them or to save time from visiting.
Then
there would be a great negative impact on oneself.
Submitted by nlchiranth11 on

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introduction
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the essay, but some phrases could be clearer. Instead of 'increasing effortlessly,' consider 'increasing significantly.'
supported main points
Ensure each paragraph addresses a single main idea with relevant support. Some sentences were slightly unclear; revising them will ensure your points are more effectively communicated.
relevant specific examples
While your examples are relevant, make sure they are detailed enough to fully support your argument. Adding more real-life instances or statistics could make your points more compelling.
conclusion
Your conclusion wraps up the essay nicely, summarizing the potential negative impacts succinctly.
task response
The essay covers the topic well and discusses both technological and social influences on people's health choices.
logical structure
You have organized your ideas logically, and each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • conventional medicine
  • health problems
  • treatments
  • doctor
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • dissatisfaction
  • additional choices
  • options
  • proven
  • proper regulation
  • safety
  • effectiveness
  • holistic approach
  • integration
  • beliefs
  • preferences
What to do next:
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