Although necessary experimentations play a pivotal role in scientific discovery, fauna must not be threatened. While some people argue that experimentation on animals is deleterious and it should be outlawed,others are of the view that discoveries in scientific fields can only be made by using animals for demonstration. I opine that harming wildlife should not be encouraged just for benefiting the society because it plays an important role in our ecosystem.

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Although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

topic is widely debated, people must not ignore it as frivolous.Experimentations performed on

wildlife

Use synonyms

may help in augmenting

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

scientific discoveries

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but will jeopardize animal

wildlife

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

reports published in China, many species of bear

got

Verb problem

were

show examples

diagnosed with cancer after performing multiple experiments only to trace back their ancestral history.

Therefore

Linking Words

such

Linking Words

actions alleviate endangering species which

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

result

Correct subject-verb agreement

results

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

extinction.

Moreover

Linking Words

such

Linking Words

actions must be prohibited by regulating authorities and the government should take strict actions against

this

Linking Words

act. Discovery in the field of science can be improved if other options are availed.

Firstly

Linking Words

, experimentations should be done on microbes ,

for example

Linking Words

, bacteria and algae etc.

For Instance

Linking Words

, many experimentations involved the use of bacteria ,which had been helpful in diagnosing diseases and unveiling

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

causes.

Secondly

Linking Words

, only the infected species or the organism should be selected to perform experiments

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Lastl

Correct your spelling

Last

, advancements in the field of technology can aid in opening the doors to scientific worlds ;

therefore

Linking Words

, it will not deteriorate the natural ecosystem and will not risk

wildlife

Use synonyms

. In a nutshell, causing threats to animal life should not be accepted. It is suggested that other improved alternatives should be chosen ,for protecting and preserving

wildlife

Use synonyms

should be an international concern. In the end , governments must impose strict laws to eradicate

this

Linking Words

action or

otherwise

Linking Words

fauna will face unprecedented consequences.

uroojzulqernainFri Aug 16 2024

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task achievement

Your essay presents clear arguments against animal experimentation and suggests alternatives. However, ensure that each paragraph contains one clear main idea that is fully developed. For example, the first body paragraph can discuss the moral implications of animal testing, while the second can elaborate on alternatives.

coherence cohesion

Try to improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use linking words or phrases to show contrast or agreement, such as 'However', 'Moreover', 'In addition', and 'On the other hand'. This will help to improve coherence and cohesion.

coherence cohesion

Proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and ensure consistency in tense and structure. This includes fixing minor typos such as 'lastl' to 'lastly'. Grammatical accuracy will make your arguments clearer and more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction sets the stage well for the debate on animal experimentation, clearly stating your opinion that it should not be encouraged.

task achievement

You have provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the bear species diagnosed with cancer and the use of bacteria in experiments.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments and reiterates the necessity of protecting wildlife, strengthening your overall stance.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

234 words

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Education is important for young people in many countries. However, some people think that the government should spend more money on education for adult population who cannot read and write. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there is more advantage to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?

Some young people like to copy the behaviour and clothes of famous people. Why might this be the case? What problems might it cause