Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a gap year, before they work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #year #gap #work #university #chance #horizons #waste #time

Education has become an important part of everybody's life. Despite that, many university students take a

year

of travelling after their graduation.

This

Change the determiner

These

show examples

actions are viewed to bring positive benefits,

such

as enhancing their knowledge and experience;

while

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

others see it as a reckless action of wasting time.

Nevertheless

, I would say that taking a gap

year

is not an effective decision for a graduate for some reasons that are set out below. For a lot of

person

Change to a plural noun

people

show examples

, a fresh new graduate should start their work instantly after the university is finished since a valuable

year

just got wasted for some inconvenience travelling. They believe these actions could lead to lost opportunities and momentum that they built for years.

However

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

is a good source to enhance your resume with

experiences

Correct article usage

the experiences

show examples

you have gotten.

Similarly

, people criticize gap

year

for losing pre-employee's

focus

. They see "gappers" might lose their academic

focus

during their journey.

As a result

, increasing the difficulties to return to an organized routine.

Nevertheless

, I would argue that taking a

year

off is basically taking a break from the intense learning that you have gotten for years. A gap of a

year

can

offers

Change the verb form

offer

show examples

a needed break to renew the

focus

and energy for starting their careers. In summary, it is true that some people may spend 12 months on a vacation waiting time and losing

focus

, many more will use

this

time productively to gain experiences that ultimately benefit their personal profile and their mind and it is

therefore

a beneficial experience.

Submitted by riani.the2 on Sat Aug 17 2024

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Ensure that all arguments are clearly supported with specific examples or evidence. This will help to make your points more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Work on maintaining a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and transitions smoothly to the next point.

task achievement

Check for grammatical accuracy and consistency in your writing, as some errors detract from the overall clarity of your arguments.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the topic and presents both perspectives, which sets up a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

The essay acknowledges both sides of the argument and attempts to address them, which is key to a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion summarizes the main points and provides the writer's opinion, which aids in giving the essay a complete structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a gap year, before they work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some people think it would be better for large companies and industry to move to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Leaders and directors in an organization are normally older people. Some people think younger leaders would be better. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

In many countries,there is a growing gap between the technical skills of younger people and those over the age of fifty. What problems does this cause, and what solutions could minimise the problems?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+