IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The charts below show the hours worked per week by people in four European countries in 2002.

The charts below show the hours worked per week by people in four European countries in 2002.
the bar charts illustrate in France, Denmark, Sweden and the UK the hours spent for work per week in 2002.
overall
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, the time spent in Sweden for work is the most almost in all group ages. Individuals between 21 and 40 are the
people
Use synonyms
 who worked the most in these four countries. The sum of the ratios of the 1 to 14 years old who worked is the least.
To begin
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 with, in all countries in the group aged between 36 to 40, 50% of
people
Use synonyms
 worked except in France.
Although
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, in France, 50% of
people
Use synonyms
 have worked at the age of 31 to 40, but
also
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 a high proportion have worked at 36 to 40 in the bar chart shows just blew off 40% of
people
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
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, in all countries below 31 adults had not worked as much as those above 30 and the amount is negligible in comparison, especially in the UK.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in the UK elderly individuals worked very well as shown and in Denmark above 41 the ratio stays steady and has not changed up to 50.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratios" was used 2 times.
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