People's live are now surrounded by advertisement. This affects what people consider important and has a negative impact on people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Incurrent generation
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
has
surrounded us in our everyday Correct subject-verb agreement
have
life
. Many Fix the agreement mistake
lives
people
believe it as
a significant improvement in an individual’s lifestyle. Correct your spelling
is
While
others argue that it has a negative impact
over
Change preposition
on
people
lives. I partly agree with both statements. And to explain Change noun form
people's
this
further
, this
essay will discuss both perspective
and try to explain using suitable examples to provide a better explanation for both perspectives.
On the one hand, in cities back in the 1900s, the advertisements began with spreading Change to a plural noun
perspectives
information
either about some news or products as it was the era of inventions, and it become
became a part of our daily lives. These advertisements provided updated Verb problem
apply
information
about the advancement in technologies
. Fix the agreement mistake
technology
On the other hand
, comparing
it the rural regions, Where the Wrong verb form
compared
advertisement
and marketing not
a strong suit, Add a missing verb
were not
people
felt backwards and huge difference in opinion when travelled
to the cities and restricted growth Wrong verb form
travelling
due to
lack of information
and knowledge. This
shows the direct impact
of advertisement
on our daily lives.
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
However
, critics
Change noun form
critics'
critic's
argument
passed in Fix the agreement mistake
arguments
current
generation Add an article
the current
is
based on false and limited Correct subject-verb agreement
are
information
used on a daily basis to influence one’s opinion. To put things into perspective, advertisement
can create a bubble Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
to
false Change preposition
of
information
which boost
sales and Correct subject-verb agreement
boosts
benefit
big companies but harms Correct subject-verb agreement
benefits
people
in the long run can
Correct word choice
and can
also
cause financial strain. For instance
, in 1978 a detergent company launched an advertisement
campaign that was made
based on false Verb problem
apply
information
which resulted in boost
in sales but caused skin irritation after using Add an article
a boost
for
long periods of time. Correct pronoun usage
it for
Furthermore
, these advertisements are often led by huge discounts and cashback offers. This
states some of the negative influence
of Fix the agreement mistake
influences
advertisement
in society.
In conclusion, the
Correct article usage
apply
advertisement
are important for society as Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
it
provide Correct pronoun usage
they
information
of
Change preposition
on
advancement
Correct article usage
the advancement
in
products. Change preposition
of
However
, it also
have
some negative Change the verb form
has
impact
on society and Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
control
Fix the infinitive
to control
this
impact
government can make new strict policies and laws that would enable individuals to make better decisions based on true and full information
around
the products.Change preposition
about
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on
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task achievement
Ensure that your argument is clear and consistent throughout the essay. It is important to clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain this position throughout your body paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to your sentence structures and grammar. There are some errors that make your writing less clear. For example, 'it become became' should be 'it became.'
coherence cohesion
Use connectors and cohesive devices more effectively to improve the flow of your essay. For example, instead of 'On the one hand' use 'Firstly' and follow a similar pattern in subsequent paragraphs.
task achievement
The introduction clearly outlines the scope of the essay and introduces the main idea.
task achievement
The essay includes specific examples to support the arguments, which adds depth to the discussion.
coherence cohesion
You have concluded the essay effectively, summarizing your main points and suggesting a possible solution.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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