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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a paritcular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a paritcular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tourists #paritcular #caribbean #island #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given line graph depicts the
number
Use synonyms
 of visitors travelling
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 Caribbean
island
Fix the agreement mistake
islands
show examples
 over a period of 7 years, starting from 2010. The data is measured in
millions
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen clearly from the chart that the
number
Use synonyms
 of travellers who stayed on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 experienced a stabilized trend
whereas
Linking Words
, visitors on cruise ships showed an upward trend.
However
Linking Words
, total
number
Use synonyms
 of visitors increased gradually over the years.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, tourists staying on cruise ships were the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 in 2010 which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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accounted for below 0.5
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
while
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 reached its peak in 2017 with
exact
Correct article usage
an exact
show examples
 2
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. From 2013 to 2015, the
number
Use synonyms
 of travellers on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 remained the same with 1.5
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. But the total
number
Use synonyms
 was 1 million which was the highest in 2010
as well as
Linking Words
 there was a dramatic increase of 3.5
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 with some stability up to the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2017.
Submitted by mahamudzisan on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • upward trend
  • steady increase
  • peak
  • stabilization
  • notable change
  • market saturation
  • seasonal variations
  • tourism infrastructure
  • external factors
  • global economic conditions
  • persistent popularity
  • demand patterns
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