IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time. Write a letter to your boss. In your letter • explain why you want to reduce your working hours • say which hours you would like to work • describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

#hours #study #part #time #boss #work #studies #employer
Dear Sir or Madam I am writing to inform you I would
like
Add the particle
like to
show examples
 reduce my working hours, I am glad to share with you
I
Correct word choice
that I
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passed the final examination and I
accepted
Add a missing verb
was accepted
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in
Change preposition
into
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 an engineering course
in
Change preposition
at
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 a famous university
and
Correct word choice
apply
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I am looking forward to attending
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
university and
continue
Wrong verb form
continuing
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study
Wrong verb form
studying
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Therefore
, if I want to attend
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
class and study ,I will not
enough
Add a missing verb
have enough
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 time. If you confirm my request I will be happy. I know my job is very important and if you reduce my
work
 time probably it will damage
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
my
work
, but I have good experience in
this
 regard so I can manage my
work
 and come to
work
in
Change preposition
on
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another days
Replace the adjective
another day
other days
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.
Correct your spelling
For
for example
, I
work
 on Friday and I
promise
Add the particle
promise to
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 do my task every week .
In addition
 that course
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 us to manage engineering
work
 in our department. I am looking forward to hearing from you soon. Best regards.
Submitted by zohmoz93 on

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single idea per paragraph
Ensure that each paragraph addresses one main idea clearly. This will make your letter easier to read and follow.
logical structure
Your letter should be more organized with clear transitions between your points. This will improve the logical structure of the letter.
suitable writing tone
Use a polite and professional tone consistently throughout your letter to align with the expectation of writing to a boss.
complete response
You've clearly stated your request to reduce working hours and provided a reason for it.
greeting and closing
You have included a polite closing, which is appropriate for a formal letter.
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