Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #technology

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Nowadays, some individuals argue that technological improvements have made their lives more convenient than before.

However

, others disagree with

this

point of view. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I shall elaborate on the reasons and discuss my opinion more.

Firstly

, it is obvious that some enhancements,

such

as the Internet, have become common for daily usage in terms of creating more comfort for our lifestyle.

In other words

, it is not possible to live without these improvements, as they will be able to fulfil our tasks faster.

Secondly

, if we spend enough money in these fields, we will be able to achieve our goals quickly.

Also

, it is vital to pay attention to how we will be able to renew our way of purchasing,

such

as e-commerce since it would be a great idea if we considered it regarding the fast procedure.

For example

, in the USA, most people tend to buy their needs through online websites. They think that

this

way is cleaner and faster than others.

On the other hand

, critics assume that it is essential to focus on traditional methods that can be helpful regarding our progress.

However

, I strongly believe that we have to concentrate on cutting-edge technologies that can assist us in a better prospect.

Additionally

, it is crucial to generate new technological concepts that will help us with their fast process.

For instance

, in India, some students prefer to find a job opportunity at high-tech corporations that can promote themselves properly, and it will be beneficial for their future. In conclusion, it is necessary to use technological developments

due to

their convenience.

Also

, we will be able to do our duties faster than by other methods. I strongly think that cutting-edge technologies will be beneficial for our prospects, and they will be useful regarding fast operation.

Submitted by ali.pazoki72 on Mon Aug 19 2024

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task achievement

Your essay could benefit from adding more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, when discussing the convenience of online shopping, mentioning services like Amazon or specific statistics about e-commerce growth can strengthen your points.

coherence cohesion

There is room for improvement in terms of maintaining a consistent focus throughout your essay. Try to ensure that each paragraph directly relates to your main argument without deviating from the topic.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and sets up the discussion effectively. This helps the reader understand the context of your essay.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay, reinforcing your argument about the benefits of modern technology for shopping.

task achievement

You have clearly presented both sides of the argument and provided a balanced view. This shows a good understanding of the task requirements.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

301 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

online marketplaces
mobile payment options
personalized advertising
accessibility
compare prices
decision fatigue
impulse buying
financial imprudence
privacy and data security
transformed
streamlined
user-friendly

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