You recently bought a toy from a company online. When the toy was delivered, you found some problems with it. Write a letter to the company manager. In your letter: -Describe the toy -Explain the problems with it -Tell the manager what you would like her/him to do

#toy #company #manager #-describe #-explain #-tell

Dear Sir, Hope you are well. I placed an order for a remote-controlled truck for my teenage son a few days back which was delivered yesterday, August 21st. The truck and its remote both use rechargeable lithium-ion batteries.

Additionally

, a user manual with instructions on operating the

toy

was provided in the package. Per the description on your website, the

toy

also

has a 1-year warranty from the date of purchase. When my son put the supplied batteries in and tried to operate the

toy

, neither the truck nor the remote functioned. We

also

tried to troubleshoot the problem. We first tried charging both batteries for a few hours but that did not work. We

also

tried operating the

toy

with all cables attached but that did not work either. Please repair the issues with the

toy

or provide a replacement. If either is not possible, please refund the amount paid for the order and

also

provide a prepaid shipping label so I can ship it back to you. Thanks for your time and I look forward to your prompt response on

this

matter.

Also

, I have attached the invoice for your reference and included my contact details below. Yours sincerely, Nakulesh

Submitted by nakuleshj1998 on Fri Aug 23 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider breaking down some longer sentences to enhance readability. For example, the sentence starting with 'We first tried charging both batteries...' can be split for clarity.

greeting and closing

Clear and polite greeting and closing, setting a respectful tone.

complete response

The letter provides a complete and detailed description of the toy and its problems, fulfilling the task requirements.

suitable writing tone

The writing tone is very suitable for a formal complaint letter, maintaining politeness throughout.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

202 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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You recently bought a toy from a company online. When the toy was delivered, you found some problems with it. Write a letter to the company manager. In your letter: -Describe the toy -Explain the problems with it -Tell the manager what you would like her/him to do

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

A country becomes more interesting and develop more quickly when its population includes a mixture of nationalities. To what extend do you agree pr disagree?

Some people believe that the latest technology is creating a divide between rich and poor. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some companies have uniforms for their staff which must be worn at all times. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Some say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their spare time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.