Discipline is ever increasing probelm in modern schools. Some people think that discpline should be the responsibility of teachers, while others this that this is the role of parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinioon.

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Discipline
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plays an indispensable role in every aspect of life, which, unfortunately, is a growing concern in the modern education system.
While
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some people believe that
teachers
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can more effectively
discipline
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students
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, others argue that
parents
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should take
this
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responsibility.
Nonetheless
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, I subscribe to the former view; in my perspective, interactive learning under the supervision of trained instructors in school provides invaluable disciplinary skills, which cannot be obtained at home.
This
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essay will discuss why a set of society believes that
teachers
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should be held responsible for disciplining
students
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, and why others advocate against it. On the one hand, it is believed that
teachers
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are the embodiments of excellence and
discipline
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.
In other words
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, since classrooms encompass a diversity of
students
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,
teachers
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, pertaining to their illustrious knowledge and vast experience, are well-equipped to cultivate different types of
students
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.
For instance
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, in several schools,
teachers
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devise various activities for
students
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to participate in, with each requiring different rules and regulations to follow.
Thus
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,
teachers
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are professionally educated and trained, equipped with the skills to produce more disciplined
students
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, with their diverse nature notwithstanding.
On the other hand
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,
parents
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know their
children
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more well. To elaborate on
this
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, since the upbringing of
children
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primarily takes place at home, not only are
parents
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well aware of their
children
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's instincts, but
also
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know what type of treatments could benefit them.
For example
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, if
children
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had not behaved well in restaurants,
parents
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would know what sort of punishment is going to improve their behaviour.
Similarly
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,
parents
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would reward their
children
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accordingly
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if their
children
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had shown
discipline
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in restaurants.
Hence
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, it is parent's understanding of their
children
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that makes them more responsible for instilling
discipline
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in them. In conclusion,
albeit
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although
show examples
parents
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understand their
children
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's natural instincts more pronouncedly,
teachers
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can ingeniously handle their
students
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and make them disciplined by engaging them in different skilful activities. In my view,
teachers
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can educate
children
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about the significance of
discipline
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and the downside of undisciplinary approaches through interactive and collaborative learning in conjunction with the enactment of violation of regulations.

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task achievement
Consider providing a clearer connection between your main points and examples for stronger impact. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure you proofread your work to correct small grammatical errors and awkward phrases. This will help to maintain the fluency and accuracy of your writing.
coherence and cohesion
Work on maintaining a more varied sentence structure to make your essay more engaging.
introduction
Your introduction is clear and sets the stage well for the rest of the essay. It provides a solid context and clearly presents your position.
task achievement
You have provided balanced viewpoints for both sides of the argument, which helps in showcasing a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
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