Some people believe that it is the resposibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Diacuss both views and give your opinion.
The issue of public
health
has sparked considerable debate in recent times. While
some people
argue that individuals
are accountable for managing their own health
and dietary choices, others maintain that community health
should be in charge by the political leadership. In my opinion, I totally agree with the former perspective. This
essay will explore both sides of the argument before reaching a conclusion.
On the one hand, there are some arguments in favour of the idea that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet
. To begin
with, governments can ensure everyone has access to healthy food
options, especially in disadvantaged areas. With the nutritionist, the political leadership can easily build several healthy diets suitable for specific ages and provide food
to low-income families and individuals
. Furthermore
, governments also
can control food
quality, labeling
, and advertising. Change the spelling
labelling
People
do not need to be worried about food
safety when the government
sets a standard in food
production, processing, and storage to minimize contamination. For instance
, the United States is a prime example of a country with extensive government
regulations in the food
industry with a complex system with varying levels of control.
On the other hand
, there are several reasons to support the statement that it is the responsibility of individuals
to take care of their own health
and diet
. Initially
, people
have the right to choose their lifestyle and dietary habits. Each person can decide what to consume based on specific dietary restrictions due to
religious, cultural, or health
reasons, such
as halal, kosher, gluten-free, or lactose-intolerant diets. Similarly
, some people
choose to follow a vegetarian diet
so they can not eat meat due to
government
requirements. Another reason would be that individuals
can manage their healthcare expenses more efficiently. The cost of an equal diet
for every citizen might be higher than the extent that the government
can control so based on the amount of salaries each person made, they can decide the suitable diet
for them. For example
, someone with a monthly income of $10,000 has more flexibility in their food
choices compared to someone who only makes $1,000.
All in all, the facts mentioned above have created a dilemma when people
evaluate the effects of this
issue, and it has still sparked controversy in recent years. As far as I am concerned, I put more emphasis on the idea that health
and dietary choices can be decided by individuals
instead
of political leadership. People
should have further
consideration on this
issue.Submitted by mgnm140307 on
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task achievement
The essay could benefit from a more explicit presentation of personal opinion throughout the text. Consider explicitly stating your view at the start and reiterating it in each body paragraph.
task achievement
Ensure that all arguments are consistently supported by relevant examples or evidence. Adding more specific examples would strengthen the essay.
coherence cohesion
The transitions between ideas are smooth, but the essay could use more linking phrases or words to further guide the reader through the argument.
coherence cohesion
Consider structuring the body paragraphs to more clearly separate the viewpoints. This can help make each argument stand out more distinctly.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly states the topic and presents both sides of the argument effectively.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the essay and provides a clear final opinion.
task achievement
The arguments presented are logical and well-reasoned.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
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