The diagram illustrates the process that is used to manufacture bricks for the building industry. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram illustrates the process that is used to manufacture bricks for the building industry.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The following diagram illustrates the protocol used to manufacture
bricks
for the building industry for construction work.
Firstly
,
Terrain
Correct article usage
a Terrain
show examples
made up of
clay
is dug by
digger
Correct article usage
a digger
show examples
and is
then
transported to a roller and a metal grid to filter any impurities like rocks and minerals that may be present in the
clay
. The segregated
clay
is
then
mixed with sand and water to put in a
mold
Change the spelling
mould
show examples
to take
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
shape of a brick, another way of making
bricks
is by cutting the
clay
into the shape of a cuboid with the help of a wire cutter. The
clay
moulds are
then
put into a drying oven for 24-48 hours to let the
clay
dry and
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
then
put under severe temperatures ranging from 200 to 1300
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
show examples
to harden the
clay
. Following it is the cooling process of the
bricks
which
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
anywhere from 48 to 72 hours. Since
bricks
are symmetrical, they are easy to package and deliver.
To conclude
, A brick is a mixture of sand and
clay
which is put under severe conditions to shape and harden
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
.
Submitted by satyarthverma88 on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words bricks, clay with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacture
  • brick(s)
  • building industry
  • digging
  • extraction
  • raw material
  • clay
  • mixing
  • moulding
  • wire cutting
  • drying oven
  • firing
  • kiln
  • high temperatures
  • hardening
  • cooling
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • traditional
  • modern
  • environmental considerations
  • sustainability practices
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