Many believe that the goal of one's career should be to pursue a passion while others feel it is merely a way to earn a livelihood. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#career #passion #livelihood

In the recent era, many believe that individuals should consider their

passion

or hobby as a career option,

while

others opine that it is not a smart choice as it's

Correct article usage

the

show examples

only method of survival.

This

essay will discuss whether following a

passion

is a good decision or

individuals

Correct word choice

whether individuals

show examples

should take up regular jobs which are available in the present day.

To begin

with, every individual has a different set of

talent

Fix the agreement mistake

talents

show examples

or a

passion

which they wish to follow, but they do not get enough support from their parents or elders to

Correct your spelling

pursue

pursure

Correct pronoun usage

pursure it

show examples

, as it is believed that converting a

passion

Change preposition

show examples

full time

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

job is risky.

Although

, it is not necessary that

this

mindset might be true. There are a number of popular personalities

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

famous singers, actors and

artists

who have stated in their

biography

Fix the agreement mistake

biographies

show examples

about the hate and negativity they received from their family, friends or other people when they were struggling in their initial years before they got successful. It is not always necessary

that

Change preposition

for

show examples

a person following a

passion

be failed

Wrong verb form

fail

show examples

For instance

, a survey from Hollywood states that around 78% of

artisits

Correct your spelling

artists

who are passionate about their work

gets

Correct subject-verb agreement

get

show examples

signed up for extra roles or movies if they are consistent and hardworking.

On the contrary

, many people believe that

passion

does not

gaurantee

Correct your spelling

guarantee

a secure future.

This

might be true to some extent as earnings are totally

depended

Replace the word

dependent

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

market trends. Celebrities who are popular may lose contracts with their employers in the future,

also

the

artists

who are new in the industry can get exploited by some greedy contractors.

For instance

, a market trend study from

the

Correct article usage

show examples

UK production house suggests some interesting facts

such

as, the

artists

who were earning

Change preposition

apply

show examples

millions in the late 1990s lost around 90% of their total earnings by the year 2000 and

due to

the increased competition newbie

artists

are willing to work even below the minimum wage. To

conlude

Correct your spelling

conclude

, many

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

people become successful by following their

passion

, as it takes several years to achieve

milstones

Correct your spelling

milestones

also

sucess

Correct your spelling

success

or fame is not

gauranteed

Correct your spelling

guaranteed

even if you are the most unique or talented artist in the choice of your industry.

Submitted by patelvaibhav1463 on Tue Aug 20 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to improve clarity and coherence

coherence cohesion

Use a wider variety of linking words to create smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs

task achievement

Expand on your supporting points with more detailed examples to make your argument stronger

task achievement

Avoid repetitive phrases and sentences to enhance readability and make your essay more engaging

task achievement

You have addressed both views and provided a balanced discussion, which meets the task requirements well

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the essay

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

369 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many believe that the goal of one's career should be to pursue a passion while others feel it is merely a way to earn a livelihood. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that exams are an inappropriate way of measuring student’s performance and should be replaced by continuous assessments. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some education systems make students focus on certain subjects at the age of 15, whileothers require students to study a wide range of subjects until they leave school. What are the benefits of each system? Which is better?

Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduces the ammount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is increasingly popular to have year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries than ever before. In over to become integrated into society in their adopted countries, immigrants should abandon their old ways and adapt to local customs and codes of behaviors. Do you agree or disagree.